In other words Happy New Year.
I am writing this at the late hour of 5:30 am but I am a temporary prisoner in my bedroom as the tribe (minus Heather who arrive tomorrow morning) can be found sleeping all over the place. Best Keto and I stay put at least til daybreak.
We were royally entertained last night by the MiaGreta show.It was a very musical program and of course included a lot of dancing.
Pizza was provided by Joey's and two very good looking delivery guys.
Dessert was of course the traditional sugar cookies baked by Nana; decorated by Amelia and her sidekick.
Today's agenda includes the farmers market in the am aned either the pool or beach in afternoon,
This is my real Christmas. I don't care what the calendar says!
Wednesday, December 31, 2008
Wednesday, December 24, 2008
Happy Birthday, Howard
Happy Birthday, but who's counting, right?
People are always surprised by our friendship (they are the ones who knew us when we were married) but what they don't know is even thou we weren't successful at that we always respected each other's abilities and gifts.
Ihave often said you could sell refrigerators to eskimos..no, wait that's not politically correct..to the indiginouos peoples of Alaska. You are and have been so successful at whatever you set out to do careerwise.
And, unlike most engineers, you are very articulate, especially on paper. I've often wondered what you could do if you tried creative writing,
You are a caring friend, once you decide to be a friend.
(you're a little picky in that department).
And when all is well, you have a terrific sense of humor and can be quite funny.
As you've mellowd with age I've seen you as very empethitic for others suffering,
So...some of the reasons I'm glad we are friends. Happy Birethday...don't forget; every day's a gift!
People are always surprised by our friendship (they are the ones who knew us when we were married) but what they don't know is even thou we weren't successful at that we always respected each other's abilities and gifts.
Ihave often said you could sell refrigerators to eskimos..no, wait that's not politically correct..to the indiginouos peoples of Alaska. You are and have been so successful at whatever you set out to do careerwise.
And, unlike most engineers, you are very articulate, especially on paper. I've often wondered what you could do if you tried creative writing,
You are a caring friend, once you decide to be a friend.
(you're a little picky in that department).
And when all is well, you have a terrific sense of humor and can be quite funny.
As you've mellowd with age I've seen you as very empethitic for others suffering,
So...some of the reasons I'm glad we are friends. Happy Birethday...don't forget; every day's a gift!
Christmas Eve 20008
The afternoon wind had died down; the dog has had his afternoon walk including serious business, the oven is warming for homemade pizza and I am sipping my favorite chardonnay. Tomorrow I will do ironing and paint a chair. i made the mistake of reading for four hours today and my eyes haven't recovered yet. Definately going to have that cateract suergury next summer.
Another beautiful day in southwest Florida. What did you say the date was?
No way. This can't be Christmas!
Another beautiful day in southwest Florida. What did you say the date was?
No way. This can't be Christmas!
Thursday, December 18, 2008
Happy Birthday, Tricia
tomorrow is a big one for Patricia Ann. I went back a year in blog history to see what I wrote on her last birthday and I wouldn't change a word. And I'm not just being lazy.
I am looking forward to their visit and hope we get time to talk.
We also need everyone to start praying for decent traveling weather for my tribe.
Happy Birthday,Mrs. Hertz\
Love, Mom
I am looking forward to their visit and hope we get time to talk.
We also need everyone to start praying for decent traveling weather for my tribe.
Happy Birthday,Mrs. Hertz\
Love, Mom
On demand blogging
This is a special "on demand" blog entry for my beloved sister-in-law that I figured I would share with the rest of you.
She asks "what are you doing down there?"
Reading, almost daily trips to Walgreen's for something or other, CLEANING THE CONDO ( it is an endless job//the floors need to be done about everyday.) Making trips to Wal-mart for something or other about twide a week, reading; trying to finish memoirs, getting ready for my tribe to arrive starting the 29th, reading, going to my PD exercise class, walking the dog at least 4 times a day; in other words, not much.
I am not doing any more decorating until Patty is here as I promised she would have input on guest rooms. My rooms are done enough so I am even staying away from shopping furniture until she is here.
I have definitely cut back on spending; needless to say economy has affected my earnings from the business and my investnents. Is there anybody out there that has not been affected?
I haven't blogged because everyone else seems to have drifted to face book and I prefer this but not if I get no response.
that;s it. Oh, I forgot one more thing. I've been basking in the sun on my lanai almost every day. hard work...
She asks "what are you doing down there?"
Reading, almost daily trips to Walgreen's for something or other, CLEANING THE CONDO ( it is an endless job//the floors need to be done about everyday.) Making trips to Wal-mart for something or other about twide a week, reading; trying to finish memoirs, getting ready for my tribe to arrive starting the 29th, reading, going to my PD exercise class, walking the dog at least 4 times a day; in other words, not much.
I am not doing any more decorating until Patty is here as I promised she would have input on guest rooms. My rooms are done enough so I am even staying away from shopping furniture until she is here.
I have definitely cut back on spending; needless to say economy has affected my earnings from the business and my investnents. Is there anybody out there that has not been affected?
I haven't blogged because everyone else seems to have drifted to face book and I prefer this but not if I get no response.
that;s it. Oh, I forgot one more thing. I've been basking in the sun on my lanai almost every day. hard work...
Friday, December 5, 2008
The hardware store
I probably visit my favorite hardware store on the island at least once a week, maybe more. It's very similar to the old fashioned stores and the staff on the floor helps you every step of the way. I had special help the other day.
The guy who offered to help me was an older guy, thin, big curled up moustache and a slow methodical way about him. I'm sure thats what most people see. I saw someone with parkinson's but how to bring up the subject? I could really offend him if I wash wrong or scare him if I was right and he didn't know it yet.
So when he was showing me how to attach a new plug to wiring, I said "I'm not sure I can do that when it is that small because I have Parkinson's disease and sometimes even on the meds I will have tremors."
He gasped and looked me in the eye and said "I have Parkinson's too!"
"I know" I replied.
"How did you know?"
"I just recognize the symptoms and guess pretty accurately,"
Well, from then on we talked like we had known each other forever. We kept moving to the back of the aisles because no one at the store knows about it. He has been diagnosed for only a year and is just on Mirapex, which is the way I started,
there is such a strong emotional connection when you find another PD patient and even though I feel that I wouldn't want to be in a support group.
What gives me away as a PD patient to others? the only visible thing I am aware of is my posture and slowness.
But there is so much more going on that others can't see that it is almost a joyous event to meet someone who does understand.
The guy who offered to help me was an older guy, thin, big curled up moustache and a slow methodical way about him. I'm sure thats what most people see. I saw someone with parkinson's but how to bring up the subject? I could really offend him if I wash wrong or scare him if I was right and he didn't know it yet.
So when he was showing me how to attach a new plug to wiring, I said "I'm not sure I can do that when it is that small because I have Parkinson's disease and sometimes even on the meds I will have tremors."
He gasped and looked me in the eye and said "I have Parkinson's too!"
"I know" I replied.
"How did you know?"
"I just recognize the symptoms and guess pretty accurately,"
Well, from then on we talked like we had known each other forever. We kept moving to the back of the aisles because no one at the store knows about it. He has been diagnosed for only a year and is just on Mirapex, which is the way I started,
there is such a strong emotional connection when you find another PD patient and even though I feel that I wouldn't want to be in a support group.
What gives me away as a PD patient to others? the only visible thing I am aware of is my posture and slowness.
But there is so much more going on that others can't see that it is almost a joyous event to meet someone who does understand.
Thursday, November 27, 2008
releasing from guilt
THIS IS AN OFFICIAL ANNOUNCEMENT TO ALL CHILDREN, SPOUSES, AND GRANDCHILDREN OF CHARLENE HERTZ DYBEDOCK: I hereby release you from any twinges of guilt you may feel about my being alone today. It really is OK for several reasons. Actually, here are the top ten reasons I do not mind being alone today:
10. I'm really not alone; Keto is here.
9. It was my idea.
8. I have your Christmas visit to look forward to (dangling prep... I know)\
7. The forecast is mid 70's and SUNSHINE
6. I still have projects on condo to finish
5. I won't have to listen to any football games today
4. I do realize you have other families
3. Some of those other relatives are more fun to be with
2. I hate fixing that traditional meal; in fact, I don't have the energy gor it anymore.
And the number 1 reason you need not feel guilt: Walmart is open today!
Happy Thanksgiving to all my extended family!
10. I'm really not alone; Keto is here.
9. It was my idea.
8. I have your Christmas visit to look forward to (dangling prep... I know)\
7. The forecast is mid 70's and SUNSHINE
6. I still have projects on condo to finish
5. I won't have to listen to any football games today
4. I do realize you have other families
3. Some of those other relatives are more fun to be with
2. I hate fixing that traditional meal; in fact, I don't have the energy gor it anymore.
And the number 1 reason you need not feel guilt: Walmart is open today!
Happy Thanksgiving to all my extended family!
Wednesday, November 19, 2008
Being alone
I got a good taste of being alone yesterday,, I went to my first PD exercise class (there's another story) and when I walked out to my car I was feeling virtuous.
You may or may not know I have one of those fancy cars that doesn't have a key. Instead I have a gizmo that I carry in my purse and the car has a button I push to start the car, except that button doesn't work when the gizmo has a dead battery; which is the conclusion I came to after a few moments of panic.
The church office was open and the minister and office manager were there. I explained my problem and asked if there was a taxi service in town; there is one who will come to the island from Naples ($$$$) and since no one in the church office offered to run me home to pick up spare, this adventure was going to cost me about what I put in the offering on a Sunday, at least.
Back in my car waiting for the cab I called my dealer in Kankakee who said I could mail it and they would put new battery in but it would be cheaper for me to take it to the lccal dealer. Nothing about this adventure was going to be cheap; the dealer is in North Naples thru heavy traffic and I would not want to have to make that trip if I dould avoid it.
To share my misery I called my brother who suggested that I try to open gizmo and see what kind of battery it is and I might be able to get it at Walgreens, So when taxi arrived we went to Walgreens, found a battery that looked right and went back to my impotent car; the idea was brilient but i didn't have the tools or steady hands to get the old battery out or the new one in.
Reluctantly I rold the driver to tke me to my home and I would pick up the spare. Which we did then went back to the island and the church and the dead car. The spare worked, the cab driver tab and tip came to $45 and I went home, took out the old battery, put in the new and it worked!
A jumble of feelings; pride that I managed the situation on my own; frustration with the church I consider my Florida church (I've been attending for 3 years); good fortune that I could afford that cab ride.
Another good suggesstion from the bro; carry a spare battery in the car. My recommendation? Don't buy a car that starts with a button or depend on the kindness of strangers.
You may or may not know I have one of those fancy cars that doesn't have a key. Instead I have a gizmo that I carry in my purse and the car has a button I push to start the car, except that button doesn't work when the gizmo has a dead battery; which is the conclusion I came to after a few moments of panic.
The church office was open and the minister and office manager were there. I explained my problem and asked if there was a taxi service in town; there is one who will come to the island from Naples ($$$$) and since no one in the church office offered to run me home to pick up spare, this adventure was going to cost me about what I put in the offering on a Sunday, at least.
Back in my car waiting for the cab I called my dealer in Kankakee who said I could mail it and they would put new battery in but it would be cheaper for me to take it to the lccal dealer. Nothing about this adventure was going to be cheap; the dealer is in North Naples thru heavy traffic and I would not want to have to make that trip if I dould avoid it.
To share my misery I called my brother who suggested that I try to open gizmo and see what kind of battery it is and I might be able to get it at Walgreens, So when taxi arrived we went to Walgreens, found a battery that looked right and went back to my impotent car; the idea was brilient but i didn't have the tools or steady hands to get the old battery out or the new one in.
Reluctantly I rold the driver to tke me to my home and I would pick up the spare. Which we did then went back to the island and the church and the dead car. The spare worked, the cab driver tab and tip came to $45 and I went home, took out the old battery, put in the new and it worked!
A jumble of feelings; pride that I managed the situation on my own; frustration with the church I consider my Florida church (I've been attending for 3 years); good fortune that I could afford that cab ride.
Another good suggesstion from the bro; carry a spare battery in the car. My recommendation? Don't buy a car that starts with a button or depend on the kindness of strangers.
Monday, November 17, 2008
Home sweet home
I've settled in,,it feels like home. I don't think Keto feels the same way. He still keeps looking for Rich.
Went to church Sunday and the same gang showed up for discussion group...only one missing was Carl whose hanging outin Vermont thru the holidays.
My condo complex is very quiet; the year round people go to work during day and most of the snowbirdss arent here yet.
I have discovered the down side of living next to a golf course...there is almost always landscaping machines making noise!
You csn tell I am getting my alone time; I have nothing else to report.
Went to church Sunday and the same gang showed up for discussion group...only one missing was Carl whose hanging outin Vermont thru the holidays.
My condo complex is very quiet; the year round people go to work during day and most of the snowbirdss arent here yet.
I have discovered the down side of living next to a golf course...there is almost always landscaping machines making noise!
You csn tell I am getting my alone time; I have nothing else to report.
Thursday, November 13, 2008
Update on Florida
It's starting to look like home!
Rich and I arrived last Friday and we've either been shopping for food or necessities and back here working ever since. I'm guessing about a dozen trips to Wal-Mart (I know, but it is less than 5 minutes away), several to Target and Lowe's...you get the idea,
We've accomplished a lot including painting my bedroom, bathroom and living room, painting kitchcn, installing a new garbage disposal, finished my bathroom with shelves over the throne (some assembly required),purchased a dresser for my bedroom which will be delivered Monday.
Today we hope to get artsy: hang some things and do a window treatment on the door from my bedroom to the lanai.
Keto has settled in; the weather has been beautiful, Park and Shar are on their way, and I have a long list to shop for, but NO clothes. I brought most of my summer wardrobe and when I got here realized] that I had left most of a summer wardrobe, NO new clothes; haven't even been to Chico's yet
It's been an interesting week to be with Rich, not seeing anyone else. He won't take help on anything so we are both doing our own things most ofthe time. And he has worked like crazy everyday He and Patty are using vidio cams on their computers so can call on the computer and see each other, I would love to get that system set up with my families. I know Carl and Heather are using that to talk every night.
Bike is now functioning (long story for some other time) and is calling to me.
Rich and I arrived last Friday and we've either been shopping for food or necessities and back here working ever since. I'm guessing about a dozen trips to Wal-Mart (I know, but it is less than 5 minutes away), several to Target and Lowe's...you get the idea,
We've accomplished a lot including painting my bedroom, bathroom and living room, painting kitchcn, installing a new garbage disposal, finished my bathroom with shelves over the throne (some assembly required),purchased a dresser for my bedroom which will be delivered Monday.
Today we hope to get artsy: hang some things and do a window treatment on the door from my bedroom to the lanai.
Keto has settled in; the weather has been beautiful, Park and Shar are on their way, and I have a long list to shop for, but NO clothes. I brought most of my summer wardrobe and when I got here realized] that I had left most of a summer wardrobe, NO new clothes; haven't even been to Chico's yet
It's been an interesting week to be with Rich, not seeing anyone else. He won't take help on anything so we are both doing our own things most ofthe time. And he has worked like crazy everyday He and Patty are using vidio cams on their computers so can call on the computer and see each other, I would love to get that system set up with my families. I know Carl and Heather are using that to talk every night.
Bike is now functioning (long story for some other time) and is calling to me.
Wednesday, November 5, 2008
It's personal
Maybe it's because I've met him,
maybe it's we share a faith,
Maybe it's the fact that I usually side with the minority
Like always the Indian, never the cowboy.
It feels like one of my family is now the President elect,
Like we are wise enough to elect a healer
after 8 years of blundering.
Yes, it's personal; the pride, the joy,
the well fought fight...an election night
that beats all other election nights.
Hail to the chief, Barak.
I will pray for your safety daily.
And I can say once again,
with enthusiasm,
I'm proud to be an American!
maybe it's we share a faith,
Maybe it's the fact that I usually side with the minority
Like always the Indian, never the cowboy.
It feels like one of my family is now the President elect,
Like we are wise enough to elect a healer
after 8 years of blundering.
Yes, it's personal; the pride, the joy,
the well fought fight...an election night
that beats all other election nights.
Hail to the chief, Barak.
I will pray for your safety daily.
And I can say once again,
with enthusiasm,
I'm proud to be an American!
Tuesday, November 4, 2008
Happy Birthday, Greta!
If you don’t know Greta
You bettah
She’s a dancer
And prancer
Seldom stands still
(But she will)
her snuggles are rare
seems she don’t care
but once earn her favor
then you can savor
the loving, and charming
and sometimes alarming
the red head from the east
who doesn’t like to sleep
The one and only 3 Year Old
Greta Charlene Hertz!!!!
Friday, October 31, 2008
great birthday
What makes a great birthday? A friend taking you out for lunch, a long visit on the phone with the younger son, a call from New York with the whole family singing and then a duet by those incredible singers, Amelia and Greta, a meeting of an organization that decided to sing that song again, surprise gifts from girlfriends, a phone call the day before from an old friend far away, phone calls from friends and a message from my California daughter-in-law when I got home. And I still get to look forward to dinner out with girlfriends Saturday night.
I love birthdays, no matter that the number gets higher!
I love birthdays, no matter that the number gets higher!
Tuesday, October 28, 2008
-9 days to take off
Can you tell I am focused on one thing only? I almost forgot that I have a birthday this week! As I get older they bring mixed messages. First, I am glad to have them ( I cannot believe I am that age), but they certainly reinforce how fast the time goes by. And how much of that time can be spent dealing with health issues.
Given the scary economy I feel like maybe supporting two homes is too much but then I remember what my PD doc just said. When I told her I was having some balance problems she said maybe we ought to up the dosage of Sinemet. And then she remembered I was spending the winter in Florida and said, " You won't need any increase...all my patients who spend winter in Florida are much healthier down there". Now if I could only charge it all to insurance!
Given the scary economy I feel like maybe supporting two homes is too much but then I remember what my PD doc just said. When I told her I was having some balance problems she said maybe we ought to up the dosage of Sinemet. And then she remembered I was spending the winter in Florida and said, " You won't need any increase...all my patients who spend winter in Florida are much healthier down there". Now if I could only charge it all to insurance!
Friday, October 24, 2008
Countdown -12
The countdown now is at -12; not the election, silly; departure for Florida! I have all these goals I've set for completion before I leave and lists and lists. Not doing too bad in that department.
I didn't realize how different it would be to prepare for spending 6 months instead of 3. And then there's all the "stuff" for the condo. At least it will be staying there and this process ought to get easier.
The ideal easier would be to keep a car down there, but I don't think I'm in that bracket yet! I am so tempted to start packing the car to see how much is going to make it, but I'm afraid I'll get in trouble with my brother, who takes great pride in his maximizing the space and what he can put into it. I think I'll leave it to him.
Now that I've committed to being there half the year I am eager to meet more people and establish a network of friends there. It won't be like here, but there have to be other single women in the same circumstances there; it's just a matter of finding them.
I have spent the last two weeks seeing all my doctors and getting prescriptions and appointments for next spring. I think I'll feel like that's a second home once I f ind a doctor I like down there.
I know I am hung up on this friend thing, but I know so many people here and feel supported by all those people that I am a little concerned about reaching a point where I feel that there when
Rich and Patty aren't there. I am so lucky to have them there for 3 months. I think they like it too.
I have already voted, so am trying to put election out of my mind. (And yes, Richard, I got some really great audiobooks for the ride.) When I am so invested in a candidate I get nervous for him or her. Besides the big one, we have some local contests that include friends and then in April a mayoral contest that is shaping up to be one that doesn't offer any really good choices.
I have had to fight my way out of leadership in some of my organizations; people wanting me to stay involved when I'm gone for 6 months of the year! Flattering, but not even tempting. Part of this change in my life is to start using my time differently. I really believe a person can hang on to leadership too long. It is definitely time for the next generation to take over when you've
reached my age.
So that's what I'm thinking and doing these days; it certainly hasn't been doing any writing, one o f the things I'm looking forward to in Naples. And the sun, and the warm breezes, and the slower pace, and the beach, and the time to read, the time to write and the sun!
I didn't realize how different it would be to prepare for spending 6 months instead of 3. And then there's all the "stuff" for the condo. At least it will be staying there and this process ought to get easier.
The ideal easier would be to keep a car down there, but I don't think I'm in that bracket yet! I am so tempted to start packing the car to see how much is going to make it, but I'm afraid I'll get in trouble with my brother, who takes great pride in his maximizing the space and what he can put into it. I think I'll leave it to him.
Now that I've committed to being there half the year I am eager to meet more people and establish a network of friends there. It won't be like here, but there have to be other single women in the same circumstances there; it's just a matter of finding them.
I have spent the last two weeks seeing all my doctors and getting prescriptions and appointments for next spring. I think I'll feel like that's a second home once I f ind a doctor I like down there.
I know I am hung up on this friend thing, but I know so many people here and feel supported by all those people that I am a little concerned about reaching a point where I feel that there when
Rich and Patty aren't there. I am so lucky to have them there for 3 months. I think they like it too.
I have already voted, so am trying to put election out of my mind. (And yes, Richard, I got some really great audiobooks for the ride.) When I am so invested in a candidate I get nervous for him or her. Besides the big one, we have some local contests that include friends and then in April a mayoral contest that is shaping up to be one that doesn't offer any really good choices.
I have had to fight my way out of leadership in some of my organizations; people wanting me to stay involved when I'm gone for 6 months of the year! Flattering, but not even tempting. Part of this change in my life is to start using my time differently. I really believe a person can hang on to leadership too long. It is definitely time for the next generation to take over when you've
reached my age.
So that's what I'm thinking and doing these days; it certainly hasn't been doing any writing, one o f the things I'm looking forward to in Naples. And the sun, and the warm breezes, and the slower pace, and the beach, and the time to read, the time to write and the sun!
Thursday, October 16, 2008
a letter from Josephine the plumber
I just want it on record that I am tired of both candidates saying the same things; enough already. Do we really believe that anyone is undecided after all this blather for almost two years.
I felt sorry for both of those guys. They looked worn out. How will the winner enjoy celebrating? He will fall in bed for at least two days. Somebody needs to start a movement now that would limit campaigns to 6 months. Surely the media can find all their dirt by then and certainly the voters will have seen plenty, at least enough to make a decision.
I am getting all this attention because we don't even want to look at those two right now, much less listen to them saying the same things. So here I am; a humble plumber now a media star. Only in America!
I felt sorry for both of those guys. They looked worn out. How will the winner enjoy celebrating? He will fall in bed for at least two days. Somebody needs to start a movement now that would limit campaigns to 6 months. Surely the media can find all their dirt by then and certainly the voters will have seen plenty, at least enough to make a decision.
I am getting all this attention because we don't even want to look at those two right now, much less listen to them saying the same things. So here I am; a humble plumber now a media star. Only in America!
Thursday, October 9, 2008
Preparing
Is there anything more fun than anticipating and preparing for something you really love doing?
I swear half my pleasure with winter in Florida is the anticipation. And it is only a few weeks off now.
It was a joy to be with my NY family and they just booked their tickets to Florida for Dec. 27 thru Jan 3. Carl and Heather will be there I think Jan. 1 thru 4.....so I have the best possible holiday gift to look forward to.
Then Rich and Patty will arrive for Jan thru March; we've discovered that we can live together and have a ball so I am one lucky woman.
It will be great to be so near Park and Shar this time also.
I probably shouldn't blog for a while because I've gotten nothing but Florida on the mind!
I swear half my pleasure with winter in Florida is the anticipation. And it is only a few weeks off now.
It was a joy to be with my NY family and they just booked their tickets to Florida for Dec. 27 thru Jan 3. Carl and Heather will be there I think Jan. 1 thru 4.....so I have the best possible holiday gift to look forward to.
Then Rich and Patty will arrive for Jan thru March; we've discovered that we can live together and have a ball so I am one lucky woman.
It will be great to be so near Park and Shar this time also.
I probably shouldn't blog for a while because I've gotten nothing but Florida on the mind!
Friday, October 3, 2008
From the rainy Hudson Valley
The beautiful Hertz girls are sunnier than ever but the weather is cold and damp! No matter, tjhe sun is coming out this weekend.
Tricia and Amelia met me at the airport and nothing compares to that "Nana!" greeting. We then picked up Greta from daycare and I got to experience that high all over again. Erich is busy writintg something with a Friday deadline and Tricia and I have had some "girltalk" time so it has been a great visit so far.
Carl flew into LA yesterday to surprise his wife on her birthday so if you read her blog (auntieheathen) you'lll know that was a great success.
I'm looking forward to the big kids having the weekend off and all of us celebrating Erich's BIG birthday which actually falls on Monday.
Tricia and Amelia met me at the airport and nothing compares to that "Nana!" greeting. We then picked up Greta from daycare and I got to experience that high all over again. Erich is busy writintg something with a Friday deadline and Tricia and I have had some "girltalk" time so it has been a great visit so far.
Carl flew into LA yesterday to surprise his wife on her birthday so if you read her blog (auntieheathen) you'lll know that was a great success.
I'm looking forward to the big kids having the weekend off and all of us celebrating Erich's BIG birthday which actually falls on Monday.
Saturday, September 27, 2008
The Roller Coaster
I hate roller coasters; I hate it even more when it seems life imitates one. Between the economic crisis, the election, my leaving for Florida for half the year, my final hospital board meeting coming up, a dog whose allergies are keeping Me awake I feel like I'm bouncing back and forth emotionally. I know a big piece of it is my lack of sleep...I've been averaging about 5 hours a night..and that is specially hard on the PD.
It's all this negativity that has been keeping me from blogging; who wants to air their gripes and who wants to read this *&%#.
So, in the spirit of my usual advice to others, I am going to focus on the positive and list my gratitudes for the day; Keto has scratched less today/ I'm leaving for New York Wednesday (I know that's cheating but I've enjoyed the anticipation today)/I took a nap today which really helped/ the trees are starting to turn and it continues to be sunny and in the 70's/my blood sugar is staying down near 100!
I am really looking toward time to reflect and write when I am alone in Florida. I'm a little nervous about that too, but I am ready for a challenge and new experience.
It's all this negativity that has been keeping me from blogging; who wants to air their gripes and who wants to read this *&%#.
So, in the spirit of my usual advice to others, I am going to focus on the positive and list my gratitudes for the day; Keto has scratched less today/ I'm leaving for New York Wednesday (I know that's cheating but I've enjoyed the anticipation today)/I took a nap today which really helped/ the trees are starting to turn and it continues to be sunny and in the 70's/my blood sugar is staying down near 100!
I am really looking toward time to reflect and write when I am alone in Florida. I'm a little nervous about that too, but I am ready for a challenge and new experience.
Sunday, September 21, 2008
Birthday girl
Today Miss Amelia turns 7! 7 years old. Second grade. On her way.
What kind of 7 year old, you ask?
One whose charm is a delight.
One who will gladly take a task
And show you she does it right.
Her dimples are her trademark
And she smiles most of the time;
But even if she were in the dark
Her Nana would see her shine.
As granddaughter, she's the best.
Her phone calls are a treat.
As a sister she's put to the test;
Her patience is sometimes beat.
No matter how old you get
My princess you'll always be.
But don't leave out being a vet,
Or teacher or even the V-P.
If they wanted to make a doll
who is an all American girl
Her name would be Mia
and she would have blond curls.
Happy Birthday, Amelia!
XOXOXO
What kind of 7 year old, you ask?
One whose charm is a delight.
One who will gladly take a task
And show you she does it right.
Her dimples are her trademark
And she smiles most of the time;
But even if she were in the dark
Her Nana would see her shine.
As granddaughter, she's the best.
Her phone calls are a treat.
As a sister she's put to the test;
Her patience is sometimes beat.
No matter how old you get
My princess you'll always be.
But don't leave out being a vet,
Or teacher or even the V-P.
If they wanted to make a doll
who is an all American girl
Her name would be Mia
and she would have blond curls.
Happy Birthday, Amelia!
XOXOXO
Friday, September 12, 2008
clarification
Contrary to what the previous blog may have implied I have never voted a straight party ticket in my life.
I may be crazy
Ok, I may be crazy but I am going to blog once more on politics. The following are my opinions only based on my experience only.
We had book club last night and we hardly touched the book because the passions were running so high that we talked about the presidential race ; well, that's not totally true. We talked about the role of women primarily. No surprise to anyone, but most of my friends in book club are progressives, mostly vote Democratic. (there are, however, a few Republicans too.)
As women we all agreed. We reacted the same way to the choice of Palin and McCann's changing positions on so many issues. I won't go into all of our specifics. Not necessary.
But we came to some conclusions that were depressing.
This campaign now is polarizing our country even more, especially around the issues of religious belief and race. No question in our minds that Karl Rove is behind much of the Republican strategy. He is the best at orchestrating a campaign that plays on the negatives.
And the fact that Obama wanted to take the high road shows his lack of experience and professorial background. Many of us like that about him, but it doesn't win elections. The only hope we could come up with is that the youth and people of color vote turns out in massive numbers.
We all seriously agreed that it will be a struggle for our system of government to survive 4 0r 8 more years of Republican rule, no matter who is on the ticket. Like Bill Moyers has said so eloquently, we are already on the slippery slope of losing control by the majority, in other words our democracy, to the rule or big business, big international business.
The most unique thing about this campaign isn't the gender or color issue but the funding issue. And dispute all his talk about campaign reform check out where McCann's getting his money. If you took out all the personality issues of those four people you would have the real basis of what our choice is: a government that owes its power to the fat cats or one that owes its power to the general citizenry. It's an issue not being discussed much at all by the media...they are owned and controlled by the fat cats.
There's a lot at stake in this election that isn't being discussed because we've all bought into the cult of personality epitomized by Entertainment Tonight.
I'll try to keep off this subject, but I won't swear to it!
We had book club last night and we hardly touched the book because the passions were running so high that we talked about the presidential race ; well, that's not totally true. We talked about the role of women primarily. No surprise to anyone, but most of my friends in book club are progressives, mostly vote Democratic. (there are, however, a few Republicans too.)
As women we all agreed. We reacted the same way to the choice of Palin and McCann's changing positions on so many issues. I won't go into all of our specifics. Not necessary.
But we came to some conclusions that were depressing.
This campaign now is polarizing our country even more, especially around the issues of religious belief and race. No question in our minds that Karl Rove is behind much of the Republican strategy. He is the best at orchestrating a campaign that plays on the negatives.
And the fact that Obama wanted to take the high road shows his lack of experience and professorial background. Many of us like that about him, but it doesn't win elections. The only hope we could come up with is that the youth and people of color vote turns out in massive numbers.
We all seriously agreed that it will be a struggle for our system of government to survive 4 0r 8 more years of Republican rule, no matter who is on the ticket. Like Bill Moyers has said so eloquently, we are already on the slippery slope of losing control by the majority, in other words our democracy, to the rule or big business, big international business.
The most unique thing about this campaign isn't the gender or color issue but the funding issue. And dispute all his talk about campaign reform check out where McCann's getting his money. If you took out all the personality issues of those four people you would have the real basis of what our choice is: a government that owes its power to the fat cats or one that owes its power to the general citizenry. It's an issue not being discussed much at all by the media...they are owned and controlled by the fat cats.
There's a lot at stake in this election that isn't being discussed because we've all bought into the cult of personality epitomized by Entertainment Tonight.
I'll try to keep off this subject, but I won't swear to it!
Tuesday, September 9, 2008
To all I love
May we be at peace, May our hearts remain open,
May we awaken to the light of our own true nature.
May we be healed. May we be a source of healing for all beings.
May we awaken to the light of our own true nature.
May we be healed. May we be a source of healing for all beings.
Sunday, September 7, 2008
Graditude list
`I am feeling much better about what's her name...EVERY woman I've talked to is appalled and embarrassed and turned off about her general lack of everything except looks. If he thought he would pick up the Hillary voters he should have talked to some.
Slowly I am beginning to be able to wear my levi's, even some of the Chico ones. I've slipped a few times but, in general am still staying away from sweets, especially chocolate.
Finally got major portion of estate plan taken care of; few more details and I can take that off the list (it's been there for a year)
This coming Saturday Leela is coming and the old support gang is getting together; I am looking forward to great discussions with that group. And lots of food, of course.
One more board meeting (Oct, 15) at St. Mary's and I will be finished. It will be interesting to see how they treat me when they are fund raising.
3 more weeks and I will be with my New York family! Inshallah!
Slowly I am beginning to be able to wear my levi's, even some of the Chico ones. I've slipped a few times but, in general am still staying away from sweets, especially chocolate.
Finally got major portion of estate plan taken care of; few more details and I can take that off the list (it's been there for a year)
This coming Saturday Leela is coming and the old support gang is getting together; I am looking forward to great discussions with that group. And lots of food, of course.
One more board meeting (Oct, 15) at St. Mary's and I will be finished. It will be interesting to see how they treat me when they are fund raising.
3 more weeks and I will be with my New York family! Inshallah!
Saturday, September 6, 2008
What's her name
Richard: do not read this!
I just know the Republican Party is full of active seasoned female politicians who must now be seething inside over their candidate's choice of a vp, someone who hasn't been on the scene for long and one who if she took her party's position on "family values" would be home concentrating on her role as mother. At least Hilary had her child raised and she knew what she was doing. This poor soul is caught up in the excitement, but let's see how she handles the real deal, campaigning on her own without wild John leeriing at her side. And how long do you think they can keep the press away from her? Sooner or later she's going to have to answer their questions.
I actually expected the convention delegates to fight him on this thoughtless choice. I guess I'm incapable of reasoning like a Republican. As far as I am concerned it boils down to bad judgment on his part given his age, etc. If he should win he will have done a major disservice to the country.
Did they actually think Hilary voters would vote for him because he picked a beauty queen with all the beliefs of the right wing? Surely there are a lot more qualified women in the Republican Party. Now, when this one screws up all female politicians will feel the bias spread. And don't we expect a presidential candidate to pick someone he or she knows? Or did someone else do the picking? Either way I'm convinced we'll learn something more about her that will reenforce McCann's poor judgment.
It is certainly one of the more interesting election campaigns, but we need leadership not a soap opera.
I just know the Republican Party is full of active seasoned female politicians who must now be seething inside over their candidate's choice of a vp, someone who hasn't been on the scene for long and one who if she took her party's position on "family values" would be home concentrating on her role as mother. At least Hilary had her child raised and she knew what she was doing. This poor soul is caught up in the excitement, but let's see how she handles the real deal, campaigning on her own without wild John leeriing at her side. And how long do you think they can keep the press away from her? Sooner or later she's going to have to answer their questions.
I actually expected the convention delegates to fight him on this thoughtless choice. I guess I'm incapable of reasoning like a Republican. As far as I am concerned it boils down to bad judgment on his part given his age, etc. If he should win he will have done a major disservice to the country.
Did they actually think Hilary voters would vote for him because he picked a beauty queen with all the beliefs of the right wing? Surely there are a lot more qualified women in the Republican Party. Now, when this one screws up all female politicians will feel the bias spread. And don't we expect a presidential candidate to pick someone he or she knows? Or did someone else do the picking? Either way I'm convinced we'll learn something more about her that will reenforce McCann's poor judgment.
It is certainly one of the more interesting election campaigns, but we need leadership not a soap opera.
Tuesday, September 2, 2008
HAPPY BIRTHDAY, CARL
Today is Carl Frederick Hertz' 37th birthday; what do you say about a guy like Carl?
If you're his Mom you say that he is brilliant, charming, thoughtful, good looking, fun to be around, retainer of a zillion arcane facts (you don' t ever want to go up against him in "Trivia"). clever writer, deep thinker, ....well, I could go on and on.
What I think I love about him the most is the depth of his love and concern for the people he cares about. He may sometimes forget something because his mind is off somewhere else, but I know how intensely he loves, especially his wife.
When he was just a young boy, it was clear he could take many paths...science, music, math and of course computers which is what he does for a living. But his real energy, I think, goes into his relationships.
He's a special guy to many people, but no one more than to his Mom.
Happy Birthday Carl Fred......love, Mom.
If you're his Mom you say that he is brilliant, charming, thoughtful, good looking, fun to be around, retainer of a zillion arcane facts (you don' t ever want to go up against him in "Trivia"). clever writer, deep thinker, ....well, I could go on and on.
What I think I love about him the most is the depth of his love and concern for the people he cares about. He may sometimes forget something because his mind is off somewhere else, but I know how intensely he loves, especially his wife.
When he was just a young boy, it was clear he could take many paths...science, music, math and of course computers which is what he does for a living. But his real energy, I think, goes into his relationships.
He's a special guy to many people, but no one more than to his Mom.
Happy Birthday Carl Fred......love, Mom.
Wednesday, August 27, 2008
For my beloved niece
4 things I was doing 10 years ago;
1. Revelling in the joy of living alone
2. Enjoying being healthy
3. Wishing I was a grandmother
4. Managing Midwest Tower
4 things on my to do list today
1.mail packages to my granddaughters
2.clean up my desk
3. Email my attorney on estate planning
4. picking outfits to pack for trip to Larry's wedding
4 jobs that I have had
1.Clerk at downtown Joliet Walgreens
2Traffic manager at radio station
3.Vice President of Kankakee Community College
4. Director of for profit day care center
4 movies I have watched more than once
1. Chariots of Fire
2, My Cousin Vinny
3. Moonstruck
4 West Side Story
4 places I have been
1. London
2.Paris
3. Berlin
4. Acapulco
4 places I want to visit
1. Vancouver
2. Boston
3. Albany NY
4 Montreal
4 TV shows I watch
1.The Daily Show
2The Colbert Report
3.Anderson Cooper 360
4 Reruns of Everyone Loves Raymond
4 things you may not know about me
1. I would rather be alone than at a party
2. I am an addictive person; the addictions just change
3. Most of my best friends are male
4. I never pass on chain letters or emails!
1. Revelling in the joy of living alone
2. Enjoying being healthy
3. Wishing I was a grandmother
4. Managing Midwest Tower
4 things on my to do list today
1.mail packages to my granddaughters
2.clean up my desk
3. Email my attorney on estate planning
4. picking outfits to pack for trip to Larry's wedding
4 jobs that I have had
1.Clerk at downtown Joliet Walgreens
2Traffic manager at radio station
3.Vice President of Kankakee Community College
4. Director of for profit day care center
4 movies I have watched more than once
1. Chariots of Fire
2, My Cousin Vinny
3. Moonstruck
4 West Side Story
4 places I have been
1. London
2.Paris
3. Berlin
4. Acapulco
4 places I want to visit
1. Vancouver
2. Boston
3. Albany NY
4 Montreal
4 TV shows I watch
1.The Daily Show
2The Colbert Report
3.Anderson Cooper 360
4 Reruns of Everyone Loves Raymond
4 things you may not know about me
1. I would rather be alone than at a party
2. I am an addictive person; the addictions just change
3. Most of my best friends are male
4. I never pass on chain letters or emails!
Tuesday, August 26, 2008
Anticipation
I never knew one could OD on anticipation.
The next two months are so jammed packed with events and deadlines that I am in a constant state of list making. This weekend is Larry's wedding (we're pretty sure) and I am flying with Robin and Steve. What to wear, what at wear? After all, I will be holding the position of stepmother once replaced! (Susan says no, she is Howard's wife, not the stepmother). It will be a gathering of the Dybedock clan whose typical concern with time is 180 degrees from mine. I will have to practice patience. And neither Erich or Carl can make it so that will be a downer for me, 'cause there is nothing like those 5 guys together!
When I get back I have minor surgery on some Basel cell carcinoma on my face, have some major overhaul on teeth, do the scary mammogram thing in Chicago and then take off for Albany the first of October for 5 days. That's a lot of anticipation, folks.
But, wait, that's not all! I leave for 6 months in Florida after the first of November and look forward to a whole condo to redecorate and shop for (I'm saving the guest rooms for you Patty).
That means a lot of organizing and wishfully shrinking a lot of stuff so it all fits in my car along with me, my brother, and Keto.
I am blessed to have all this in my life and to be able to anticipate such adventures, but just listing it tires me out.
And I forgot one of my main pieces of work that must be accomplished by Sept. 7. I have to prepare an 8 week program on prayer and meditation for the adult Sunday school class that I have been facilitating.
And, oh yes, we are still without the cleaning lady (hurt her back) so I am doing a lot of housework these days that I haven't done in about 30 years. I had not anticipated that!
The next two months are so jammed packed with events and deadlines that I am in a constant state of list making. This weekend is Larry's wedding (we're pretty sure) and I am flying with Robin and Steve. What to wear, what at wear? After all, I will be holding the position of stepmother once replaced! (Susan says no, she is Howard's wife, not the stepmother). It will be a gathering of the Dybedock clan whose typical concern with time is 180 degrees from mine. I will have to practice patience. And neither Erich or Carl can make it so that will be a downer for me, 'cause there is nothing like those 5 guys together!
When I get back I have minor surgery on some Basel cell carcinoma on my face, have some major overhaul on teeth, do the scary mammogram thing in Chicago and then take off for Albany the first of October for 5 days. That's a lot of anticipation, folks.
But, wait, that's not all! I leave for 6 months in Florida after the first of November and look forward to a whole condo to redecorate and shop for (I'm saving the guest rooms for you Patty).
That means a lot of organizing and wishfully shrinking a lot of stuff so it all fits in my car along with me, my brother, and Keto.
I am blessed to have all this in my life and to be able to anticipate such adventures, but just listing it tires me out.
And I forgot one of my main pieces of work that must be accomplished by Sept. 7. I have to prepare an 8 week program on prayer and meditation for the adult Sunday school class that I have been facilitating.
And, oh yes, we are still without the cleaning lady (hurt her back) so I am doing a lot of housework these days that I haven't done in about 30 years. I had not anticipated that!
Saturday, August 23, 2008
Obama/Biden
So what do you think, Obama fans? I was actually cheering for Hilary as VP, as long as Bubba could have been sent to a remote island.
I know all the reasons the pundits have given for his choice but I have a different theory. I think he wanted a father figure in that role. If ever in his life he needed a wise father it is now.
I know, Biden brings a lot more to the table but he is kind of a loose cannon; I just have this feeling that when he went down the short list, the missing father thing influenced him.
I know all the reasons the pundits have given for his choice but I have a different theory. I think he wanted a father figure in that role. If ever in his life he needed a wise father it is now.
I know, Biden brings a lot more to the table but he is kind of a loose cannon; I just have this feeling that when he went down the short list, the missing father thing influenced him.
Wednesday, August 20, 2008
the bad tree
In my backyard there are two huge trees; I have felt privileged to live in such close proximity to them. The beauty is the massive oak in the northeast corner. The BAD one is a black locust that has just had radical surgery.
We had a wind storm (some people thought it was a tornado) about 2 weeks ago. Our neighborhood is still cleaning up from the tree damage. And as usual with any wind of substance a major branch of the locust came down, this time on my neighbor's patio, destroying it.
BAD TREE! When Tim, the tree man, came to see what could be done he first decided that one of the large limbs needed to come down but the rest would be ok. That was before he went up there in his bucket. Once up there he discovered the main trunk had a split that made the whole thing a potential disaster.
So I said the words that no one in my neighborhood ever wants to say; "OK, take it down".
This is a tree that is over a hundred years old with a trunk that must be at least two feet in diameter. All the tops have been removed and what is left looks like a skeleton tree. Tim will take the rest down in the winter when things aren't so busy and the ground is frozen and I won't have to be here to watch!
Not to mention an expense you don't want. It took 3 guys over 7 hours to remove tops so you know it is not inexpensive. With all this going on here I forgot to worry about Fay and whether she did damage to the condo.
The joys of being a home owner/condo owner!
We had a wind storm (some people thought it was a tornado) about 2 weeks ago. Our neighborhood is still cleaning up from the tree damage. And as usual with any wind of substance a major branch of the locust came down, this time on my neighbor's patio, destroying it.
BAD TREE! When Tim, the tree man, came to see what could be done he first decided that one of the large limbs needed to come down but the rest would be ok. That was before he went up there in his bucket. Once up there he discovered the main trunk had a split that made the whole thing a potential disaster.
So I said the words that no one in my neighborhood ever wants to say; "OK, take it down".
This is a tree that is over a hundred years old with a trunk that must be at least two feet in diameter. All the tops have been removed and what is left looks like a skeleton tree. Tim will take the rest down in the winter when things aren't so busy and the ground is frozen and I won't have to be here to watch!
Not to mention an expense you don't want. It took 3 guys over 7 hours to remove tops so you know it is not inexpensive. With all this going on here I forgot to worry about Fay and whether she did damage to the condo.
The joys of being a home owner/condo owner!
Friday, August 15, 2008
About time
I know; I''m a slacker.
We just got back from Saugatuck and need about two weeks to catch up on sleep and energy; that crowd parties and drinks seriously. Had a great time as usual. Saw Evita at the local playhouse; visited Grand Rapids and the Meirer Gardens and ate some fantastic meals. Only slipped a few times on the sweets. Now it is back to the exercise and "hope I can stave off diabetes diet".
I am way behind on paper work and housework and reading so this is just a short note to family that I made it through all the construction and 80-94 and am home again.
We just got back from Saugatuck and need about two weeks to catch up on sleep and energy; that crowd parties and drinks seriously. Had a great time as usual. Saw Evita at the local playhouse; visited Grand Rapids and the Meirer Gardens and ate some fantastic meals. Only slipped a few times on the sweets. Now it is back to the exercise and "hope I can stave off diabetes diet".
I am way behind on paper work and housework and reading so this is just a short note to family that I made it through all the construction and 80-94 and am home again.
Friday, August 1, 2008
Happy Birthday,
Little Bro
He’s an interesting person, steady as the Rock
Full of contradictions, dependable as the clock.
Unshakable in his beliefs; no middle of t he road,
He’s a black and white kind of guy, I’m told.
A private person who doesn’t always share.
Hard to know what he thinks; does he care?
Yet at a party or socially engaged
He acts as if he’s comfortable on stage.
He can be selfish and humble and stone faced too.
No matter the subject don’t tell him what to do!
And then there is his Papa self,
Loving and playful, an oversized elf.
Ask the women in his life, and there’s a lot.
“Dear”, “Papa” ‘Dad” and little “Bro”
We all love you so.
And me? Well, I get the last word.
I think there is still much you’ve not heard
Did I mention he’s an artist? A builder, a great salesman?
Did I tell you how much time we spend laughing?
He can cook a mean stir-fry (stay out of the kitchen!)
His talents are many, so many I gave up the rhyme
Happy Birthday, Bro. Only one year to go
For the big one.
A new month
It's a new month and it seems fitting that I should take note of its beginning.
August is probably not on many lists of people's favorites; weather, you know. I think of it as a month of anticipation. For years it has meant a trip to Saugatuck and time with two of the people I love dearly, Park and Shar Davis. It is the month of my brother's birthday..August 2...and I look forward to the time we spend together in the winter, not to mention my gratitude that he is still around for birthdays.
August always offers up little hints of autumn, my favorite season. I am usually ready for summer to be over by mid August; by then it is easier to justify the condition of the garden.
And, of course, even still in my old age August brings the anticipation of school, which was always my first love. Now I experience it vicariously thru my son the professor and my granddaughter, the second grader.
August is rich with wonderful sounds too....the cicadas in the evening, the tree frogs all night, the sounds of neighborhood children playing out doors and the thunk of the tennis balls at the courts in our neighboring park.
Welcome, August, but I must warn you that my mind is on list making and preparing for the first part of November and departure to Florida. I will try to keep enough of my mind here to appreciate what you have to offer.
August is probably not on many lists of people's favorites; weather, you know. I think of it as a month of anticipation. For years it has meant a trip to Saugatuck and time with two of the people I love dearly, Park and Shar Davis. It is the month of my brother's birthday..August 2...and I look forward to the time we spend together in the winter, not to mention my gratitude that he is still around for birthdays.
August always offers up little hints of autumn, my favorite season. I am usually ready for summer to be over by mid August; by then it is easier to justify the condition of the garden.
And, of course, even still in my old age August brings the anticipation of school, which was always my first love. Now I experience it vicariously thru my son the professor and my granddaughter, the second grader.
August is rich with wonderful sounds too....the cicadas in the evening, the tree frogs all night, the sounds of neighborhood children playing out doors and the thunk of the tennis balls at the courts in our neighboring park.
Welcome, August, but I must warn you that my mind is on list making and preparing for the first part of November and departure to Florida. I will try to keep enough of my mind here to appreciate what you have to offer.
Tuesday, July 29, 2008
No news is good news
I want to bury my head in the sand;
I want to disown this land.
Turn off the news please,
Cancel the paper, save the trees.
It's never been this bad
And my reaction is to get mad.
Which quickly turns to sad.
I refuse, I choose to be glad.
When the sorrows and worries
loom large in the news stories
I turn my back and look
to escape in a good book.
I have to believe that doom and gloom
will not prevail; flowers will bloom
families will gather in love and care Friends support each other and share.
So I am taking a vow to turn off the news
It will carry on without my views.
Mindfulness practice, my new defense
Living my life with less stress.
I urge you to join me in quiet repose
Pray if it helps you to be composed.
Look at the joys in your own life
and do your best to ignore the world's strife.
Irresponsible, you say?
but I've had my day.
So I'll do my best
to enjoy the rest.
The hell with Lou Dobbs, ok?
I want to disown this land.
Turn off the news please,
Cancel the paper, save the trees.
It's never been this bad
And my reaction is to get mad.
Which quickly turns to sad.
I refuse, I choose to be glad.
When the sorrows and worries
loom large in the news stories
I turn my back and look
to escape in a good book.
I have to believe that doom and gloom
will not prevail; flowers will bloom
families will gather in love and care Friends support each other and share.
So I am taking a vow to turn off the news
It will carry on without my views.
Mindfulness practice, my new defense
Living my life with less stress.
I urge you to join me in quiet repose
Pray if it helps you to be composed.
Look at the joys in your own life
and do your best to ignore the world's strife.
Irresponsible, you say?
but I've had my day.
So I'll do my best
to enjoy the rest.
The hell with Lou Dobbs, ok?
Thursday, July 24, 2008
Slackers
There is a general trend going here wherein members of my clan have been especially unproductive in the blogging department. I too am guilty.
Do you ignore your computers in the summer?
Are your lives too busy for this chattering with friends and family?
Or are your lives so routine that you have no news to share?
Have all your creative juices dried up under the sun?
Do you wish to be alone?
Do you check other sites to see if anyone you know is blogging?
Just wondering.
Do you ignore your computers in the summer?
Are your lives too busy for this chattering with friends and family?
Or are your lives so routine that you have no news to share?
Have all your creative juices dried up under the sun?
Do you wish to be alone?
Do you check other sites to see if anyone you know is blogging?
Just wondering.
Monday, July 14, 2008
Only Begun
Searching, no, rummaging in the storage closet
Looking for pictures that might work f or a project,
I get sidetracked in the past, proof before my eyes
In living color. I used to be thinner, brighter, younger.
And I suddenly hunger for that energy
That purpose that pursued power.
And then to be confronted with the proof of another trait
As I walk through the house. There is evidence everywhere.
I start so many things that I don’t finish.
Proof one is this poem that I dropped my project for
Then there’s the basket by the rocker that had three afghans started
Books stacked with little post- its, part of a gift idea;
Files to be cleaned out half done
How many good intentions have I only begun?
Saturday, July 12, 2008
Medical report #327
Oh, joy, oh joy; I do NOT have Diabetes. About 3 weeks ago I had a blood sugar test that was higher than normal and the doctor said stay away from sugar and sweets until you see me in three weeks. Did that. Not as hard as I thought it would be 'cause I was reaaally motivated. When I saw him this week I had lost 9 lbs., my blood pressure was down, the swelling I've been having in my ankles was down and I was able to report that I was exercising more and feeling much better. His good news was that the second test that I took, something more than blood sugar, indicated I was not diabetic....YET.
Bottom line: I have gotten past the craving stage, am really motivated by the weight loss and feel like I've been liberated. Enough medical talk.
I am already preparing for Florida; can't help myself. The plan is to leave about Nov. 5 from here and Rich will fly back on 14th ; will be on my own until they return in January. Some time or other my kids will come down and that's when we'll have our holidays whenever that is.
I'm already working on Christmas presents ( I am making something this year) and trying to figure out a way to avoid trucking those down there. If you're on my list you just may get a Christmas gift in early November.
Bottom line: I have gotten past the craving stage, am really motivated by the weight loss and feel like I've been liberated. Enough medical talk.
I am already preparing for Florida; can't help myself. The plan is to leave about Nov. 5 from here and Rich will fly back on 14th ; will be on my own until they return in January. Some time or other my kids will come down and that's when we'll have our holidays whenever that is.
I'm already working on Christmas presents ( I am making something this year) and trying to figure out a way to avoid trucking those down there. If you're on my list you just may get a Christmas gift in early November.
Monday, July 7, 2008
HELP !
The house is surrounded by mosquitoes and chiggers! the minute I step out the door I am under attack. That means in about 4 weeks we will run out of food! (we did major shopping this past weekend). What if I run out of clear nail polish? (free tip; it's the best at killing the chiggers who burrow under your skin and stay as long as they want).
I bet that's what has been bothering Keto's right paw..he won't let anybody take a look..if you try he starts to snap at you (even me).
I'm serious about this: I don't even want to go out there and water the flowers or get the mail.
What to do?
I bet that's what has been bothering Keto's right paw..he won't let anybody take a look..if you try he starts to snap at you (even me).
I'm serious about this: I don't even want to go out there and water the flowers or get the mail.
What to do?
Tuesday, July 1, 2008
Business as unusual
It is 5:30 am and I have just exchanged lengthy emails with my attorney who didn't return my phone call yesterday. Is this technology great or what?
Now if only I could get my doctors email addresses.
Now if only I could get my doctors email addresses.
Thursday, June 26, 2008
Happy Birthday, Scott and Steve
Why do we always say "Scott and Steve" instead of "Steve and Scott"? Alphabetical?
What ever order you use it doesn't matter to these two identicals (even though, I could alway s tell them apart). What I love about these guys, among other things, is their devotion to each other. I can't imagine what it must be like to be a twin, but I bet nobody does it better than they do.
Our relationship began formally when I married their Dad in August of 1974; they were about 5 years old and despite some drama and intense feelings they accepted me as step-mom from the beginning. Those visits when all 6 kids were together were, for the most part, great fun and a lot of that was due to the easygoing and accepting nature of these two.
They have grown into responsible, good natured, fun loving guys who always put family first. Scott was lucky to marry Audrey and bring two beautiful kids into the family; Gracie and Christian are both precious.
Steve has had the good fortune to add Robin to the family and for that we are all grateful. It's no secret that Steve and I share a lot of likes and dislikes; he is the Dybedock that I feel closest to and see more of. But, I love them both and they have made my life richer by being part of it.
So, Happy Jack Benny, you two (or are you too young to get that reference?). I am proud of you both, delighted to still call you my sons and wish you many more birthdays in good health.
What ever order you use it doesn't matter to these two identicals (even though, I could alway s tell them apart). What I love about these guys, among other things, is their devotion to each other. I can't imagine what it must be like to be a twin, but I bet nobody does it better than they do.
Our relationship began formally when I married their Dad in August of 1974; they were about 5 years old and despite some drama and intense feelings they accepted me as step-mom from the beginning. Those visits when all 6 kids were together were, for the most part, great fun and a lot of that was due to the easygoing and accepting nature of these two.
They have grown into responsible, good natured, fun loving guys who always put family first. Scott was lucky to marry Audrey and bring two beautiful kids into the family; Gracie and Christian are both precious.
Steve has had the good fortune to add Robin to the family and for that we are all grateful. It's no secret that Steve and I share a lot of likes and dislikes; he is the Dybedock that I feel closest to and see more of. But, I love them both and they have made my life richer by being part of it.
So, Happy Jack Benny, you two (or are you too young to get that reference?). I am proud of you both, delighted to still call you my sons and wish you many more birthdays in good health.
Morning joy
Four a.m.
The quiet that only exists in the early morning hours.
I make my way in the dark to my command post;
The glow of the computer, the nest I love the most.
Today I will get back to my writing.
And then I hear the drip, drip, dripping of rain
Off the porch roof; puddling in the garden,
The pace changing as if the drummer switches beats;
Now coming down in heavy sheets;
A moment later slowing gently to a waltz.
The few cars splashing by lay d own the melody
And the birds awakening join in.
Light slowly creeps up from the east
And, oh, the joy at being at the feast,
Awash in a symphony of senses.
Tuesday, June 24, 2008
Elvis has left the building!
The New York Hertz clan was visiting for 4 days this past week and the energy flowed! Greta alone can charge up a room with just her look and add Amelia who gets chattier when excited and then there is their beautiful extroverted mother. Add to this my stoic quiet son, and you instantly have all the entertainment you could ask for.
Unfortunately the adults are sleep deprived and so not their perkiest, but Tricia seems to me much happier now that she is back in the adult world that values her skills. Erich needs to be sitting in front of his computer writing, but with all that female attention how can he pull him self away? ( Amelia told me what she loved about her Daddy the most was how patient he is).
And Greta Charlene, who makes me feel very special when she greets me with one of those running throwing herself into my arms greetings. She is very much starting to leave the two year old behavior behind and acting more and more like she's closing in on three. She has mellowed quite a bit and I'm guessing that the peer interaction at daycare has been good for her.
Then there's amazing Amelia with two missing front teeth, almost 7, going on 17, who treats me to having a slumber party with her every night. We have some very serious conversations snuggling in bed watching a movie. She is inquisitive, thoughtful, bright, and very concerned about other's feelings. And of course even with missing teeth she still is that beautiful child with the blond hair and the dimples and sparkling eyes.
Every time I see them I better understand what I am supposed to be doing with the rest of my life. I can only feel that my job with the time I have left is to everything I possibly can to make their world a little better, to be a role model for them in growing old gracefully despite the aches and pains, to stay engaged enough to use my life's hard gained wisdom to somehow leave them a legacy of values that will help them know what is most important.
Not being able to see them every day means I value more the days I do get with them, even though I struggle with my lack of energy. They are everything a nana could want in grand children. I am so proud of my son and now, daughter; they are surely doing something right.
To my son and his harem: I love you more than you could know until it's your turn to be t he grand parent!
Unfortunately the adults are sleep deprived and so not their perkiest, but Tricia seems to me much happier now that she is back in the adult world that values her skills. Erich needs to be sitting in front of his computer writing, but with all that female attention how can he pull him self away? ( Amelia told me what she loved about her Daddy the most was how patient he is).
And Greta Charlene, who makes me feel very special when she greets me with one of those running throwing herself into my arms greetings. She is very much starting to leave the two year old behavior behind and acting more and more like she's closing in on three. She has mellowed quite a bit and I'm guessing that the peer interaction at daycare has been good for her.
Then there's amazing Amelia with two missing front teeth, almost 7, going on 17, who treats me to having a slumber party with her every night. We have some very serious conversations snuggling in bed watching a movie. She is inquisitive, thoughtful, bright, and very concerned about other's feelings. And of course even with missing teeth she still is that beautiful child with the blond hair and the dimples and sparkling eyes.
Every time I see them I better understand what I am supposed to be doing with the rest of my life. I can only feel that my job with the time I have left is to everything I possibly can to make their world a little better, to be a role model for them in growing old gracefully despite the aches and pains, to stay engaged enough to use my life's hard gained wisdom to somehow leave them a legacy of values that will help them know what is most important.
Not being able to see them every day means I value more the days I do get with them, even though I struggle with my lack of energy. They are everything a nana could want in grand children. I am so proud of my son and now, daughter; they are surely doing something right.
To my son and his harem: I love you more than you could know until it's your turn to be t he grand parent!
Tuesday, June 17, 2008
Auspicious date
Just noticed the date when I posted my last entry. Noel should remember it. And a happy birthday and anniversary to Rhonda Dybedock Crink. How many years, Rhonda?
Sorry Keto
Major discovery: Keto is vacationing at Howard and Sue's and I have slept nearly 8 hours both nights. This is major for me as I have been sleep deprived for so long I didn't remember what a good night's sleep felt like.
I think he has grown more restless as he gets less exercise. Let's face it, if you spent the day sleeping on t he couch you probably wouldn't sleep soundly at night either. And he too is getting old so maybe his sleep pattern is affected by that. I'm not aware that he is disturbing me but he is probably keeping me from deep sleep (just watched a 60 minute special on sleep and am now an expert).
So who thinks I can train him to sleep elsewhere? If I let him anywhere in my room will that have the same effect? Do I have to shut him out until he gets the picture? If there are any animal experts that know how to teach an old dog new tricks, let' s hear it.
I think he has grown more restless as he gets less exercise. Let's face it, if you spent the day sleeping on t he couch you probably wouldn't sleep soundly at night either. And he too is getting old so maybe his sleep pattern is affected by that. I'm not aware that he is disturbing me but he is probably keeping me from deep sleep (just watched a 60 minute special on sleep and am now an expert).
So who thinks I can train him to sleep elsewhere? If I let him anywhere in my room will that have the same effect? Do I have to shut him out until he gets the picture? If there are any animal experts that know how to teach an old dog new tricks, let' s hear it.
Monday, June 16, 2008
the good and the bad
You have to get t h e impression that not much happens here; I haven't been doing much blogging because my writing part of the brain seems to be on vacation.
You'd be right about not much happening here; the daily severe weather alerts have been the big excitement. Today Dottie and I go to Joliet. She has a doctor's appointment and I am finally making that trip to the cemetery with the flowers. Exciting, huh?
The real thing happens Wednesday evening when my New York family, starring the two cutest girls in the world, arrives for a brief visit.
Too many o f my family and friends are dealing with health issues. I've reached the point of not wanting to talk about i t. Good friends who were expecting their first grandchild just found out that their daughter-in-law lost the baby. My young niece needs back surgery.
Our business is taking a hit from the inevitable dying out of the paging industry, so I am doing some work in the marketing area even though I'm retired.
And I have done nothing, zero, nada on my memoir editing project.
Not happy with myself.
You'd be right about not much happening here; the daily severe weather alerts have been the big excitement. Today Dottie and I go to Joliet. She has a doctor's appointment and I am finally making that trip to the cemetery with the flowers. Exciting, huh?
The real thing happens Wednesday evening when my New York family, starring the two cutest girls in the world, arrives for a brief visit.
Too many o f my family and friends are dealing with health issues. I've reached the point of not wanting to talk about i t. Good friends who were expecting their first grandchild just found out that their daughter-in-law lost the baby. My young niece needs back surgery.
Our business is taking a hit from the inevitable dying out of the paging industry, so I am doing some work in the marketing area even though I'm retired.
And I have done nothing, zero, nada on my memoir editing project.
Not happy with myself.
Tuesday, June 10, 2008
A Perfect Day
We were certainly due one and today i s perfect. First time I laid out on chaise (with Keto taking half the space of course) and read a book. So here I am in front of the computer instead!
I need to say what I can't bring myself to talk about and that is the signs I'm getting that my PD is advancing. Or it may be that I'm pushing myself harder. My meds wear off faster and the tremors pop up; I have a hard ti me with the keyboard; my balance is iffier and getting out of the car a is a long production. However, I have been working out more...Kay and I have added a number of things for balance, including some Yoga (which is more taxing than you think). Then I've been riding the bike downstairs for 20-25 minutes everyday. Plus trying to do some weedin g every day. All this leaves me too tired to do much else! I know if I could dump some pounds everything would be easier.................
Talked to my sister-in-law today and realized how much I miss hanging with her ....she would top my list of girlfriends to just hang out with. Now I know she reads this because we just talked on the phone, but that's not why I said that. Talking to her makes me aware that I don't have other female friends that are as much fun as she is.
Except for Greta and Amelia (and their mom). I am beside myself with that kind of inner excitement knowing that I will see t hem next week, inshallah. Now there's a pair that are fun.
I think I should skip all that rigorous exercising next week in order to save my energy for them.
I can think of so many reasons not to exercise or diet and it really shows. Ah, well. Life is good.
I need to say what I can't bring myself to talk about and that is the signs I'm getting that my PD is advancing. Or it may be that I'm pushing myself harder. My meds wear off faster and the tremors pop up; I have a hard ti me with the keyboard; my balance is iffier and getting out of the car a is a long production. However, I have been working out more...Kay and I have added a number of things for balance, including some Yoga (which is more taxing than you think). Then I've been riding the bike downstairs for 20-25 minutes everyday. Plus trying to do some weedin g every day. All this leaves me too tired to do much else! I know if I could dump some pounds everything would be easier.................
Talked to my sister-in-law today and realized how much I miss hanging with her ....she would top my list of girlfriends to just hang out with. Now I know she reads this because we just talked on the phone, but that's not why I said that. Talking to her makes me aware that I don't have other female friends that are as much fun as she is.
Except for Greta and Amelia (and their mom). I am beside myself with that kind of inner excitement knowing that I will see t hem next week, inshallah. Now there's a pair that are fun.
I think I should skip all that rigorous exercising next week in order to save my energy for them.
I can think of so many reasons not to exercise or diet and it really shows. Ah, well. Life is good.
Saturday, June 7, 2008
Barak
I sit here staring at the empty box for posting. What could I possibly say that would be o f interest to anyone else?
We think too highly of our own mental ramblings, those of us who choose to blog. Think about it. Isn't this pretty self centered to sit here at 3;30 am and imagine that anyone would want to know what is on my mind? Ah, but I do it anyway.
Since Tuesday the storyline of my musings has been the state of the union, no less. It's no secret that I am a major Obama fan and you would think I would be elated right now. No, I am stuck with this mother type worry f or him.
First big worry....some nut out there will kill him off before he's even in the office.
Second, he is in the White Ho use and finds out how little a President can change the way Washington works. After all, he will not be able to wipe out greed and lust for power.
How's tha t for a positive attitude? I think I need my paxil upped again!
We think too highly of our own mental ramblings, those of us who choose to blog. Think about it. Isn't this pretty self centered to sit here at 3;30 am and imagine that anyone would want to know what is on my mind? Ah, but I do it anyway.
Since Tuesday the storyline of my musings has been the state of the union, no less. It's no secret that I am a major Obama fan and you would think I would be elated right now. No, I am stuck with this mother type worry f or him.
First big worry....some nut out there will kill him off before he's even in the office.
Second, he is in the White Ho use and finds out how little a President can change the way Washington works. After all, he will not be able to wipe out greed and lust for power.
How's tha t for a positive attitude? I think I need my paxil upped again!
Wednesday, June 4, 2008
A Double Life
I think I've made the adjustment to living in two places and it is basically because of this wonderful little machine; I find myself staying in touch with Florida people by email so I can do the same with Ill people in the winter.!
Just came from a St. Mary's board meeting; I only have two more left and then I am off the board; not sure how that will feel but I think 21 years is too much and it's time to make room for somebody else.
I am operating on about 4 hours sleep cause I had to stay up to watch Barak's speech. Glad I did. Seeing a re-run wouldn't have felt like it did live. I have never been so interested in a presidential race as this; just hoping he doesn't get pressured to make Hillary VP.
Still missing Maryjo; Heenan's had Dotty and I and Terry over for dinner Sunday night and it is still difficult. She used to give Rosemary a list of books to take to Michigan. Rosemary asked me to do that this year and when she came over to pick up what I picked out we both wound up crying. I know there is no way I can take her place on being knowledgeable about books. Book club is not the same without her.
One of the little thrills of life: sitting down at my desk in the am and seeing that I have new pictures of my girls on the Ceiva. It looks like I may get to see them in person in a few weeks.
That's enough trivia for now.
Just came from a St. Mary's board meeting; I only have two more left and then I am off the board; not sure how that will feel but I think 21 years is too much and it's time to make room for somebody else.
I am operating on about 4 hours sleep cause I had to stay up to watch Barak's speech. Glad I did. Seeing a re-run wouldn't have felt like it did live. I have never been so interested in a presidential race as this; just hoping he doesn't get pressured to make Hillary VP.
Still missing Maryjo; Heenan's had Dotty and I and Terry over for dinner Sunday night and it is still difficult. She used to give Rosemary a list of books to take to Michigan. Rosemary asked me to do that this year and when she came over to pick up what I picked out we both wound up crying. I know there is no way I can take her place on being knowledgeable about books. Book club is not the same without her.
One of the little thrills of life: sitting down at my desk in the am and seeing that I have new pictures of my girls on the Ceiva. It looks like I may get to see them in person in a few weeks.
That's enough trivia for now.
Wednesday, May 28, 2008
Happy Anniversary
Fifteen.
Do you know what can happen in just 15 years?
Degrees, beautiful babies, new homes
Weathering storms, disagreements;
The daily challenge of living with another.
Making mistakes that hurt,
Saying things you regret.
Trying to balance each other’s needs.
Maintaining other friendships,
Sharing the duties of parenthood.
Hell, just staying civil when sleep deprived!
And always, ALWAYS, forgiving one another
Forgiving one self; for imperfections,
Unintentional hurts, freeing the way to say
“I love you, best friend.”
My prayer for you daily.
Sunday, May 25, 2008
Regrets
I have not cried in a long time.
I did not think I could.
I have numbed myself so many ways
I think I often live in a daze
Self made.
Hard to admit one hurts
Or even to give that power away.
I’ve fashioned a cloak of midnight
That wrapped me out of sight
Self safe.
The universe colludes to expose
What we want hidden.
When your presence is real
My cloak disappears, reveals
Self pain.
Nothing can fill the void
Or numb the true pain.
I made bad choices in life
I failed at being a wife.
Self alone.
That’s not always a difficult role
It suits me, I think.
It’s just seeing you that I feel
I may have missed the real deal.
Self imposed.
So I’ll carry on as I am
Life is good, I am blessed.
Meant to be single, I guess.
Self.
Becoming a character
I have no patience with public gatherings anymore. All the Parkinson books say don't become a recluse. Maybe my feeling this way is connected to that. I only know I don't want to make anymore small talk. There is just so little time left that I want to spend my time either with meaningful people or alone with my computer writing or with a book.
I am looking forward to ending my St Mary career and all the social obligations that go along with t hat. I particularly don't want to spend any more time chatting with people I don't like. Sounds like I am going backward in my socialization skills, but I think I'm really progressing towards more authenticity.
We've all known old people who were labeled "characters" or "eccentric" because they said and did whatever they felt like, not what was expected. That's my new goal. Watch me become one of them! Should be fun.
I am looking forward to ending my St Mary career and all the social obligations that go along with t hat. I particularly don't want to spend any more time chatting with people I don't like. Sounds like I am going backward in my socialization skills, but I think I'm really progressing towards more authenticity.
We've all known old people who were labeled "characters" or "eccentric" because they said and did whatever they felt like, not what was expected. That's my new goal. Watch me become one of them! Should be fun.
Thursday, May 22, 2008
All Hail Dotty!
Yesterday was a big day for my friend and housemate, Dotty Lagesse. She was selected to win the Athena Award from the Women in Business organization, a branch of the Chamber of Commerce. For once they made a good choice because she is a good businesswomen. Just becauses she runs a non for profit people forget what a complicated business it is and how much skill is involved in doing it successfully. I joined some of her family in being there for lunch. I like her Mom but she said something that really bothered me. When someone asked her if she was proud of her daughter's accomplishments, she said " Oh, I take it for granted".
Dotty is so super responsible and driven to work hard that I think too many people do take for granted what she has done with a complex and difficult task. She has to be hard nosed to deal with some of her contacts and sensitive and caring with others. She is almost always dealing with pain of some kind. She works 6 days a week and is out the door at 6 am. She is the most disciplined person I know.
Neither of us is the emotional "mushy" type so we seldom talk about our feelings with each other. When we want to say something nice we do it on paper. So this is my way of saying how proud I am to be your friend, Dotty. People will be congratulating you for weeks. Soak it all up and store it for the "bitchy" days.
Dotty is so super responsible and driven to work hard that I think too many people do take for granted what she has done with a complex and difficult task. She has to be hard nosed to deal with some of her contacts and sensitive and caring with others. She is almost always dealing with pain of some kind. She works 6 days a week and is out the door at 6 am. She is the most disciplined person I know.
Neither of us is the emotional "mushy" type so we seldom talk about our feelings with each other. When we want to say something nice we do it on paper. So this is my way of saying how proud I am to be your friend, Dotty. People will be congratulating you for weeks. Soak it all up and store it for the "bitchy" days.
Sunday, May 18, 2008
New Leaf
Alright, I am going public with this in hopes that will give me one more reason to stick to my resolve. Starting tomorrow I am lowering the caloric intake and increasing the physical activity. I am NOT going on a diet; no siree. That is a sure fire loser (and not weight) approach to my ultimate goal, which is to once again be able to fit into my Chico jeans.
I don't want to hear about how good it would be for my PD or arthritis to move more; I don't want to hear about the benefits of scaling back on my sugar intake. And I certainly don't want it pointed out that I would be better off not drinking wine every evening. But if I could only get into those Chico jeans I know I would be a happier individual. Sooooo,
Starting tomorrow I will be writing down everything I eat and drink ( a real depressing experience if you are out of control) with the expectation that I will stop buying and consuming a Dove bar every other day, stay away from Dairy Cream (I don't even like it!) and stop the compulsive eating (and, no, Oprah, I am not going to analyze why I eat compulsively).
At the same time I will, I will, I will exercise at least 30 minutes every day. Well, I'll rest on Sunday. I mean, after all, She did.
So, friends and family, hold my feet to the fire (or I should say my butt) and the next time you see me notice the label on my jeans...if it's llbean, I will not have met my goal yet. But I will. Promise.
I don't want to hear about how good it would be for my PD or arthritis to move more; I don't want to hear about the benefits of scaling back on my sugar intake. And I certainly don't want it pointed out that I would be better off not drinking wine every evening. But if I could only get into those Chico jeans I know I would be a happier individual. Sooooo,
Starting tomorrow I will be writing down everything I eat and drink ( a real depressing experience if you are out of control) with the expectation that I will stop buying and consuming a Dove bar every other day, stay away from Dairy Cream (I don't even like it!) and stop the compulsive eating (and, no, Oprah, I am not going to analyze why I eat compulsively).
At the same time I will, I will, I will exercise at least 30 minutes every day. Well, I'll rest on Sunday. I mean, after all, She did.
So, friends and family, hold my feet to the fire (or I should say my butt) and the next time you see me notice the label on my jeans...if it's llbean, I will not have met my goal yet. But I will. Promise.
Saturday, May 17, 2008
Do Not Judge
I bring my funky self to this keyboard,
this friend
Who records my myriad moods
Silently.
I am grateful for the silence..
How often well meaning friends say
“You shouldn’t feel that way,
Yadda,yadda”
Don’t tell me how I should feel.
Ever.
Most of the time my feelings are all
Jumbled; .
A little bit of this, a little bit of that.
Even contradictory,
Right now the stew contains some sorrow;
Book club minus Mary Jo...
Some loneliness; aware of my aloneness.
Peacefulness; aloneness means no tension,
I do not judge me by what I feel.
Envy.Wednesday, May 14, 2008
Happy Birthday, Park and Shar
My oldest, as in longest, friends are both celebrating their birthdays this week; they are only one day apart. Pretty rare among married folk. And they are pretty rare in other ways too. If I didn't know the Davis's I might think good marriages are impossible. But I've watched these two for over 40 years and have only witnessed a matched pair, caring for each other.
Like anyone reaching this point in life, they've had their share of pain and sorrow. But they have always had each other to support and comfort one another. They enjoy the same things, have tried a dozen or more hobbies and activities together; target practice, motorcycles, camping, sailing, skiing; whatever one wants to try the other is usually game.
Shar, however, is the cook par excel lance. Except when it comes to grilling; then Park takes over and no one can interfere. They even like the same wine!
When our children were little Shar and I kept each other sane. We were very different as mothers, but our kids had no problem adjusting to the rules of each house. Perhaps Park and Shar are like that. They may not really like all the same things, but they adjust beautifully to what the other one likes.
My prayer for them is that they live many more birthdays in good health together and when it's time to exit they will be able to do that together too. I can't imagine one without the other.
They are very special to me, chosen family.
I love you both; Happy Birthday!
Like anyone reaching this point in life, they've had their share of pain and sorrow. But they have always had each other to support and comfort one another. They enjoy the same things, have tried a dozen or more hobbies and activities together; target practice, motorcycles, camping, sailing, skiing; whatever one wants to try the other is usually game.
Shar, however, is the cook par excel lance. Except when it comes to grilling; then Park takes over and no one can interfere. They even like the same wine!
When our children were little Shar and I kept each other sane. We were very different as mothers, but our kids had no problem adjusting to the rules of each house. Perhaps Park and Shar are like that. They may not really like all the same things, but they adjust beautifully to what the other one likes.
My prayer for them is that they live many more birthdays in good health together and when it's time to exit they will be able to do that together too. I can't imagine one without the other.
They are very special to me, chosen family.
I love you both; Happy Birthday!
Sunday, May 11, 2008
Refections on Mother's Day
It 's a Hallmark holiday, right? Still, we are such brainwashed consumers that we take it seriously. Especially us mothers. Imagine how we would feel if our kids tossed it off and didn't make some kind of contact.
Lord knows my primary feeling that pops up when my mother is mentioned is guilt. It is especially present now as I have yet to make the trip to the cemetery with this years offering of plastic flowers (they're in the car though) as I promised to her as she was dying. She didn't really want them for herself, but for her beloved David lying next to her. I will spare you my thoughts on that.
Why the guilt on my part? I treated her badly; felt no respect for her; was embarrassed by
her; did the minimal in attending to her when she was alone; felt mostly relief when she died.
The older I get the more I realize she was a product of her parents; her intellectual level was not something she could change; she was a sad co-dependent non-achiever because she just was.
I judged her harshly, rejected her as a model and always felt that I was more mature and smarter than she was. Which was probably true.
Now that I've made my share of mistakes as a mother and bad choices as a woman, I wonder how my sons judge me. I know they love me. And I don''t need Mother's Day to know that.
But I wonder how they will describe me when I'm gone.
Lord knows my primary feeling that pops up when my mother is mentioned is guilt. It is especially present now as I have yet to make the trip to the cemetery with this years offering of plastic flowers (they're in the car though) as I promised to her as she was dying. She didn't really want them for herself, but for her beloved David lying next to her. I will spare you my thoughts on that.
Why the guilt on my part? I treated her badly; felt no respect for her; was embarrassed by
her; did the minimal in attending to her when she was alone; felt mostly relief when she died.
The older I get the more I realize she was a product of her parents; her intellectual level was not something she could change; she was a sad co-dependent non-achiever because she just was.
I judged her harshly, rejected her as a model and always felt that I was more mature and smarter than she was. Which was probably true.
Now that I've made my share of mistakes as a mother and bad choices as a woman, I wonder how my sons judge me. I know they love me. And I don''t need Mother's Day to know that.
But I wonder how they will describe me when I'm gone.
Friday, May 9, 2008
Calling Kay Beguhn
I am so frustratedwith myself. I am using my laptop....at a meeting in Chicago....and I accidentally deleted a long note from you that somehow went to my trash instead of inbox, I think you hadb;t put any title in the subjecft line and AT&T yahoo does that, And I don;t have your email address in this computer so if I can't find it will you re send your letter,, please and i will answer,
Thursday, May 8, 2008
The previous post
Yesterday was a special day mainly because I had so many phone calls from people I love.
The double special one was a call from Amelia; she was calling to thank me for something I sent the girls and she was so tickled with it that I could hear her smile as she talked. By the way, that is like talking to an adult now! So the previous post is what made her smile and I thought I 'd share it. Not my most sophisticated poetry, but it pleased her and that was my intent.
Talked to three sons last night and am off to Chicago this morning. Will get to have dinner with Steve and Robin and then Dotty's youngest pair visits us for weekend and Carl and Heather will be here Sunday....sounds like a great weekend to me!
The double special one was a call from Amelia; she was calling to thank me for something I sent the girls and she was so tickled with it that I could hear her smile as she talked. By the way, that is like talking to an adult now! So the previous post is what made her smile and I thought I 'd share it. Not my most sophisticated poetry, but it pleased her and that was my intent.
Talked to three sons last night and am off to Chicago this morning. Will get to have dinner with Steve and Robin and then Dotty's youngest pair visits us for weekend and Carl and Heather will be here Sunday....sounds like a great weekend to me!
Two Girls in Pink
This is a tale of two girls in pink,
A very good color, I think.
They helped pack their things
And put on their wings.
Soon they were high in the sky
Strapped in their seats, Why?
Well, to visit their Nana, you see.
And, of course, other family.
Tricia came too, but she doesn’t wear pink
Moms usually wear black or mink.
Cute those girls are but quiet they’re not;
And Nanas and Moms get tired a lot.
But back to our pink story
I’ve strayed a bit; sorry.
Look how much I have written
Without naming my “kittens”!
Amelia is oldest and wise is she
Greta is wilder; she’s not yet three.
Together they play and have fun
And at Nana’s with Keto they run.
Amelia has always loved purple and pink
Greta will follow what Amelia thinks
So when Nana goes shopping for girl stuff
She only sees pink (but not things with fluff!)
These cuties are not just sugar and spice
Don’t think they just always play nice.
They can wrestle and bike and roll in the snow
They can scuff up their knees and they grow!
And smart? Why those two in pink
Always amaze me by what they can think,
And talented too; they can sing and dance
Especially Amelia; remember she’s advanced.
Amelia is older, the big sister, the leader
She helps her Mom and is a very good reader.
And Greta is Greta. Noisy and clever
If she had her way “to bed” would be never,
Nana is eager to see them at any time
Can you guess why that is (with a rhyme?)
Two smart girls in pink who like to fly
Nana loves you so, so much, that’s why.
Tuesday, May 6, 2008
Happy Birthday, Sarah!
Today is the birthday of my beloved niece, Sarah Gregga. Her daughter Isabelle would probably tell you that she is the ancient age of 34, but I won't do that.
When I think of Sarah, the first word that comes to mind is "artist". She is very creative and artistic, always involved in some kind of project that involves expressing herself creatively, whether it be decorating, planning a party, scrap booking, knitting, or even just dressing her girls. Whatever she does she does it with a flair for color and beauty. With Jason's help her biggest project so far has been the creation of two beautiful girls.
Sarah is a family person; she didn't like being stranded out there on the East Coast. So where does she move to? Only five houses down the block from her folks. Now that wouldn't work for everyone, but with a father/grandfather who is smitten with his girls and a mother who is her best friend I think Sarah is very happy with the arrangement.
Except in the winter.
Because January thru March her Dad's job pretty much comes to a standstill Rich and Patty are able to winter with me in Florida. And that leaves Sarah very lonely. Then she only has beautiful Isabelle, equally cute Sophia, her handsome and brilliant husband Jason and THE cat, Elliot.
I'm sorry, Sarah, but when you really get old you'll understand what spending winter in Florida means to aging joints, etc, Despite what Isabelle says you are still young and beautiful. And from what I can see a wonderful mother and homemaker...two of the hardest jobs in the world.
Oh, and did I say anything about witty? Sarah knows how to come up with a phrase or comment that hits the bulls eye and usually makes us laugh. And, of course, all that talent and beauty must come from the Westerwelle in her; well, at least the talent.
She is a very special woman that makes the space around her beautiful and fun to in. Happy Birthday, Sarah.
When I think of Sarah, the first word that comes to mind is "artist". She is very creative and artistic, always involved in some kind of project that involves expressing herself creatively, whether it be decorating, planning a party, scrap booking, knitting, or even just dressing her girls. Whatever she does she does it with a flair for color and beauty. With Jason's help her biggest project so far has been the creation of two beautiful girls.
Sarah is a family person; she didn't like being stranded out there on the East Coast. So where does she move to? Only five houses down the block from her folks. Now that wouldn't work for everyone, but with a father/grandfather who is smitten with his girls and a mother who is her best friend I think Sarah is very happy with the arrangement.
Except in the winter.
Because January thru March her Dad's job pretty much comes to a standstill Rich and Patty are able to winter with me in Florida. And that leaves Sarah very lonely. Then she only has beautiful Isabelle, equally cute Sophia, her handsome and brilliant husband Jason and THE cat, Elliot.
I'm sorry, Sarah, but when you really get old you'll understand what spending winter in Florida means to aging joints, etc, Despite what Isabelle says you are still young and beautiful. And from what I can see a wonderful mother and homemaker...two of the hardest jobs in the world.
Oh, and did I say anything about witty? Sarah knows how to come up with a phrase or comment that hits the bulls eye and usually makes us laugh. And, of course, all that talent and beauty must come from the Westerwelle in her; well, at least the talent.
She is a very special woman that makes the space around her beautiful and fun to in. Happy Birthday, Sarah.
Sunday, May 4, 2008
Mood enhancer
Nice to get phone calls from the men in my life about that downer poem I posted last, but am not feeling that dire still. One, I've settled in here and have adjusted to the change in locales finally and two my bro assured me he would drive me down in November!
So what did I dream about all night? Decorating the condo, of course.
It has been strange to feel that I've mentally shifted my residence and this is the place where I don't feel as connected. But I realize that is something that I have created by dropping off boards, etc.
Some good news for a change; I had my regular visit up at Rush for the PD and this time was tested again by the psychiatrist for brain function. This was something they did 4 years ago when I was first diagnosed. It involves reciting back long series of numbers; then giving them backwards, remembering lists of words he shows you after minutes have gone be, doing spatial tests, etc. They are testing to see if you have lost brain function, memory, etc. Well, I wowed him; apparently I did better that I did 4 years a go and he even said I was the first patient he had eve r had to get 100% on one of the tests. So it's still working! That made my week.
I can plan to return to Florida before the holidays and my brain is functioning better than ever . Life is sweet.
So what did I dream about all night? Decorating the condo, of course.
It has been strange to feel that I've mentally shifted my residence and this is the place where I don't feel as connected. But I realize that is something that I have created by dropping off boards, etc.
Some good news for a change; I had my regular visit up at Rush for the PD and this time was tested again by the psychiatrist for brain function. This was something they did 4 years ago when I was first diagnosed. It involves reciting back long series of numbers; then giving them backwards, remembering lists of words he shows you after minutes have gone be, doing spatial tests, etc. They are testing to see if you have lost brain function, memory, etc. Well, I wowed him; apparently I did better that I did 4 years a go and he even said I was the first patient he had eve r had to get 100% on one of the tests. So it's still working! That made my week.
I can plan to return to Florida before the holidays and my brain is functioning better than ever . Life is sweet.
Monday, April 28, 2008
Dejected
I have never been unhappy here before
A major shift has rocked the very floor.
And I am feeling disconnected,
Adrift and undetected.
Like the wireless signal that no one hears,
I am afloat in the universe, can’t even shed tears.
And I am feeling disconnected,
Adrift and undetected.
Where do I belong now that I don’t belong?
It’s always up to me to write the song.
And I am feeling disconnected,
Adrift and undetected.
I thought I already knew the existential alone
But being split in two really sets the tone.
And I am feeling disconnected,
Adrift and undetected.
Alone and unprotected.
Dejected.Saturday, April 26, 2008
stream of ..........
I have always wanted to try just writing whatever comes into my head without censoring or editing so this is an attempt to do that ..I'm not sure that I'm not always editing in my head so I guess I will find out; however, it is hard to write stream of conciousness when you have to correct as many typos as I make because that kind of slows you d own ...where are my fellow bloggers these days? It is disappointing not to see new entries. Don't you know you are letting down your fans? I haven't been able to get into any kind of schedule since i've been back to Kankakee, not that i was that scheduled in FL but I feel like here I ought to be accomplishing more and yet my time seems to be taken up with housekeeping, shopping, cooking. etc. In FL it was nice to have people who shared the chores and I just got interrupted by Dotty leaving for work at 6:18 am on SATurday!! I keep seeing my girls out of the corner of my eye on t he Cieva screen ...the nicest gift I've ever received and it makes me think of Tricia telling me that Greta keeps saying I want to go to Nana's....wait til she goes to Nana's in the winter...swimming pool and beach and sunshine. ..I am going to have to do an attutude adjustment here in order to enjoy summer and Kankakee without wishing away the time///I can't afford to wiish away any time; I want to make th e most of every day. I don't know how many minutes i've been at this but it is abuntantly clear that I have said nothing of consequence so maybe I shouldn';t do this in public.
Thursday, April 24, 2008
Good Intentions
Good intentions overwhelm me like the bullies on the playground.
They hover just around the corner, waiting to nail me.
I smell them, sense their power over my well feeling, being.
Creatures I have created from the ambitious eager me.
Tracking me, hunting me, haunting me every moment.
I must be stuck with them forever, homeless urchins searchin’.
Waiting to set me up. For failure. For self-loathing.
They pound on the door when I try to take a nap.
They point out the pounds; every mirror; at least, the beast.
And the exercise equipment sits, alone and forlorn.
The memoir stands still as time keeps creating.
Good intentions bully me to no avail, I fail.
Wednesday, April 23, 2008
The Campaign Blues
Am I the only one who has lost interest in this marathon between the "historic" candidates?
When I first arrived at the party I was excited and filled with hope that we were going to see an intelligent contest between Clinton and Obama. I felt strongly that Obama was the better candidate and have been consistently supporting him financially.
But it has turned out to be like any other party that goes on too long...you lose that giddy high you started with and suddenly you look around the room and those that previously seemed like highly attractive and witty companions now look bedraggled and ordinary. The evening's accumulation of bad jokes, personal disclosures, barbs hurled at others has you thinking "do I want to go home with any of these people?"
Of course, neither is perfect. I still feel that Obama has more integrity and would be the person I want representing us on the world stage. And it wouldn't be a bad thing to have the first woman president (depending on what she does with Bill to get him out of the way).
And the worst actors at this party are the TV pundits. They need to be kicked out the door and if they won't go quietly somebody call the cops.
But this has gone too long and we all should have gone home hours ago. Nothing that has happened has changed my vote. I'm still with you, Barak. I'm just not as excited as I was when we first met.
When I first arrived at the party I was excited and filled with hope that we were going to see an intelligent contest between Clinton and Obama. I felt strongly that Obama was the better candidate and have been consistently supporting him financially.
But it has turned out to be like any other party that goes on too long...you lose that giddy high you started with and suddenly you look around the room and those that previously seemed like highly attractive and witty companions now look bedraggled and ordinary. The evening's accumulation of bad jokes, personal disclosures, barbs hurled at others has you thinking "do I want to go home with any of these people?"
Of course, neither is perfect. I still feel that Obama has more integrity and would be the person I want representing us on the world stage. And it wouldn't be a bad thing to have the first woman president (depending on what she does with Bill to get him out of the way).
And the worst actors at this party are the TV pundits. They need to be kicked out the door and if they won't go quietly somebody call the cops.
But this has gone too long and we all should have gone home hours ago. Nothing that has happened has changed my vote. I'm still with you, Barak. I'm just not as excited as I was when we first met.
Friday, April 18, 2008
A new experience
It's always a kick to experience something for the f irst time and this morning that something
was an earthquake. Not something we are accustomed to in Illinois. So at 4:30 am, sitting at my computer, I noticed a moment when every window in the house vibrated. I looked outside: no evidence of any wind...um, sometimes frieght trains do that in the middle of the night , but th is was much stronger an effect and since it stopped quickly, I just shrugged it off. Later, of course, I heard that we h ad experienced an earthquake.
I had a similar experience in Florida. In the middle of the day we heard a massive explosion; found out later that it was a sonic boom from the space shuttle re-entering the atmosphere before landing at Cape Kennedy.
Both times, it would have been more interesting if I had known at the time what was happening.
was an earthquake. Not something we are accustomed to in Illinois. So at 4:30 am, sitting at my computer, I noticed a moment when every window in the house vibrated. I looked outside: no evidence of any wind...um, sometimes frieght trains do that in the middle of the night , but th is was much stronger an effect and since it stopped quickly, I just shrugged it off. Later, of course, I heard that we h ad experienced an earthquake.
I had a similar experience in Florida. In the middle of the day we heard a massive explosion; found out later that it was a sonic boom from the space shuttle re-entering the atmosphere before landing at Cape Kennedy.
Both times, it would have been more interesting if I had known at the time what was happening.
Tuesday, April 15, 2008
granddaughters
They're here.....the Hertz women including my beloved and stressed daughter in law and the two cutest brightest little females who walk the ea rth. And I am exhausted. Greta lives up to her reputation and Amelia is suddenly bordering on teenagehood (she'll be 7 in Sept. and her sister is 2 and 1/2).
I am still not back in the grove or routine and am way behind on personal projects, but at least got the income tax taken care of. The grass is ready to mow; the flowers are starting to bloom and all I see around me is work. The condo looks be tter and better.
Have yet to get back to writing or exercising but next Monday I've taken a solemn vow.
I am still not back in the grove or routine and am way behind on personal projects, but at least got the income tax taken care of. The grass is ready to mow; the flowers are starting to bloom and all I see around me is work. The condo looks be tter and better.
Have yet to get back to writing or exercising but next Monday I've taken a solemn vow.
Saturday, April 12, 2008
My funk
Why does the weather have such a hold on me? I am one of those people whose mood almost entirely depends on weather. Since I just left blue skies and 80 degrees and am now in upper thirties and drizzle, I am in a funk. I can't seem to get chores done, don't want to run errands, am eating junk food....behavior that is a far cry from my behavior in Florida.
I don't think people take me seriously when I say I want to spend much more of the year there, but if you had two homes and you felt good at one and lousy at the other...... I know I have to give spring and summer here a chance, but come on already!
And this place is crammed....there is too much stuff. I am going to make every effort to get rid of some of it. In fact, my goal is to have a garbage bag of stuff cleared out every day. And I'm going to take time to write every day. And I am going to exercise every day. And no more ice cream either. So there, bad Charlene!
Fantasies, all fantasies.
I don't think people take me seriously when I say I want to spend much more of the year there, but if you had two homes and you felt good at one and lousy at the other...... I know I have to give spring and summer here a chance, but come on already!
And this place is crammed....there is too much stuff. I am going to make every effort to get rid of some of it. In fact, my goal is to have a garbage bag of stuff cleared out every day. And I'm going to take time to write every day. And I am going to exercise every day. And no more ice cream either. So there, bad Charlene!
Fantasies, all fantasies.
Friday, April 11, 2008
the power of sunshine
If there is anyone still out there who will read this I apologize for my silence. When still in Florida I always seemed to have more pressing things to do and now that I'm back in Kankakee I still need to unpack! And, by the way, I haven't seen the sun since arriving here3 days ago.
I want to hold myself to writing something everyday but even I don't believe my good intentions will be held to anymore! And there is even more to do to get this house in shape, like put away the Christmas decorations. Not kidding.
The Hertz females from Albany are due to be here this Monday; I haven't seen theme since Thanksgiving and am very excited about this visit. Can;t linger but promise to be more faithful.
I want to hold myself to writing something everyday but even I don't believe my good intentions will be held to anymore! And there is even more to do to get this house in shape, like put away the Christmas decorations. Not kidding.
The Hertz females from Albany are due to be here this Monday; I haven't seen theme since Thanksgiving and am very excited about this visit. Can;t linger but promise to be more faithful.
Saturday, March 29, 2008
moving
Today is the big change day; we will spend the first night in the condo..even though I closed the sale on Friday. A long story but we think it will be clean enough to sleep there.
Thank you for friends...we couldn't have done it without Carl and Margaret and Marv.
Patty and I were really looking forward to furniture shopping this week but we';ll be lucky to get everything in order. then Rich flies back Sunday and we head north on Monday.
I'm beginning to understand why some people prefer to stay here year round. It will be hard for me to go back to an environment where everyone is working all the time.
there is so much going on in the lives of my family and in my own .....I can/t process it all; no wonder i am writing this at 1:20 am1
Thank you for friends...we couldn't have done it without Carl and Margaret and Marv.
Patty and I were really looking forward to furniture shopping this week but we';ll be lucky to get everything in order. then Rich flies back Sunday and we head north on Monday.
I'm beginning to understand why some people prefer to stay here year round. It will be hard for me to go back to an environment where everyone is working all the time.
there is so much going on in the lives of my family and in my own .....I can/t process it all; no wonder i am writing this at 1:20 am1
Sunday, March 23, 2008
Holdilng Pattern
I am numb from the hovering in one place.
Neither here nor there
I am in holding where emotions do not
Register, rarely reply.
Questions float in without answers
I am a monstrous question mark.
I know nothing,, no answers.
This is disconcerting, at least.
Why do I feel so alone in this?
I am alone, that is probably why.
I am surely in trouble now if
I am answering my own questions.
What is it about our nature that we ask?
So many questions especially when
the answer is the same to all
"It is because that's how it is".
My questions really reveal
My desire to control; why can't
I control this feeling and cease
the nothingness of waiting.
Rather, I give in to the sense
of suspension, holding pattern,
Caught between here and there
Numb to all, to myself.
Neither here nor there
I am in holding where emotions do not
Register, rarely reply.
Questions float in without answers
I am a monstrous question mark.
I know nothing,, no answers.
This is disconcerting, at least.
Why do I feel so alone in this?
I am alone, that is probably why.
I am surely in trouble now if
I am answering my own questions.
What is it about our nature that we ask?
So many questions especially when
the answer is the same to all
"It is because that's how it is".
My questions really reveal
My desire to control; why can't
I control this feeling and cease
the nothingness of waiting.
Rather, I give in to the sense
of suspension, holding pattern,
Caught between here and there
Numb to all, to myself.
Saturday, March 22, 2008
a rainy day in Florida
Well, the first day of spring has come and gone and the weather pretty much stays the same down here.
I am feeling like I am walking around in a daze. Can't concentrate on anything, not even a good book. The reality of the condo is crowding all other thoughts. the fact that I did it; the work coming up to make it my own, the fact that Patty and I will be on our own doing that move, etc. I have all the paper work done and am ready for closing,
I am thinking of Tricia and her decisions; likewise, Carl's decision, but I can only wish for them thaat they find their true path.
I haven't done any writing and perhaps that is what I should be doing (blog doesn't count).
I think I'll take a nap.
I am feeling like I am walking around in a daze. Can't concentrate on anything, not even a good book. The reality of the condo is crowding all other thoughts. the fact that I did it; the work coming up to make it my own, the fact that Patty and I will be on our own doing that move, etc. I have all the paper work done and am ready for closing,
I am thinking of Tricia and her decisions; likewise, Carl's decision, but I can only wish for them thaat they find their true path.
I haven't done any writing and perhaps that is what I should be doing (blog doesn't count).
I think I'll take a nap.
Monday, March 17, 2008
Only a few more weeks
this may be spring break and the beginning of Florida fun for a lot of folks, but for the snowbirds it's drawing to a close. it means saying good bye to a whole new set of friends and thinking about all the processes of shutting down one residence and going home to another residence and another set of friends.
For me that means friends who work and are not available to go boating, go bargain shopping, lie by the pool together or go out for lunch. That makes for a sharp contrast in my two lives. I'm hoping the trait they'll share is no winter weather. That's why I need to figure out a way to get down here in December next season.
Anyway, we're wrapping up group activities this week; today is last meeting of the writing group; I have only 2 more Sundays leading discussion, and there are no domino sessions scheduled with anyone.
Am I homesick yet for Kankakee? Not really.. It will be good to see everyone, especially at St,John. but I know I am looking at a lot of yard work and doctor's appointments. If I am homesick for anything it is seeing my granddaughters. Hopefully, that will be soon.
For me that means friends who work and are not available to go boating, go bargain shopping, lie by the pool together or go out for lunch. That makes for a sharp contrast in my two lives. I'm hoping the trait they'll share is no winter weather. That's why I need to figure out a way to get down here in December next season.
Anyway, we're wrapping up group activities this week; today is last meeting of the writing group; I have only 2 more Sundays leading discussion, and there are no domino sessions scheduled with anyone.
Am I homesick yet for Kankakee? Not really.. It will be good to see everyone, especially at St,John. but I know I am looking at a lot of yard work and doctor's appointments. If I am homesick for anything it is seeing my granddaughters. Hopefully, that will be soon.
Friday, March 14, 2008
Surprises
Yesterday was a day of surprises for me. First I had to prepare my info for Mark to get my income taxes prepared. I will definitely be surprised if I don;t have to cough up a bunch extra, but I was surprised when I added up my charitable giving; it was higher than it's ever been which makes me happy that I could do what I did.
Secondly, we went on a boat ride with Carl and Margaret and for the most part I really enjoyed it. I didn't care about getting so close to the gulf and I didn't like going full speed but I was not as uncomfortable as I thought i would be.
And then the discussion around the dinner table surprised me, We got into a political discussion and Carl and Margaret and I pretty much share the same thoughts. Rich and Patty are about 180 degrees from us and our debate got a little heated at times but everyone was disagreeing agreeably and all parted friends, I think, Of course, no one changed antibody's mind but we are one of the few places in the world where we can talk freely and disagree with our government and each other and not be afraid to do so.
And we were disagreeing passionately!
Today we go to the Hess' for lunch and dominoes; these are friends who will agree with Rich and Patty so since I will be so outnumbered ]'ll keep quiet if we get into politics!
Secondly, we went on a boat ride with Carl and Margaret and for the most part I really enjoyed it. I didn't care about getting so close to the gulf and I didn't like going full speed but I was not as uncomfortable as I thought i would be.
And then the discussion around the dinner table surprised me, We got into a political discussion and Carl and Margaret and I pretty much share the same thoughts. Rich and Patty are about 180 degrees from us and our debate got a little heated at times but everyone was disagreeing agreeably and all parted friends, I think, Of course, no one changed antibody's mind but we are one of the few places in the world where we can talk freely and disagree with our government and each other and not be afraid to do so.
And we were disagreeing passionately!
Today we go to the Hess' for lunch and dominoes; these are friends who will agree with Rich and Patty so since I will be so outnumbered ]'ll keep quiet if we get into politics!
Wednesday, March 5, 2008
Big Deal
This really is a big deal to me. I realize it's right up there with the decision to end my marriage to Howard and move out on my ownl. That was scary and I was surrounded by friends nearby.. ...this time I am creating a new home and life for part of each year in an environment that I have only vacationed in.''
I am so glad that I booked for 3 months this year and not just because of the weather up north. That extra month has given me a sense of being a seasonal resident, not just on vacation. I know people think I am rationalizingwhen I say it is for my health, but I wish I could convey how much healthier I feel down here.
I have begun to build new friendships, mainly thru church, I will be only about 4 minutes from the Davis' although their schcdule requires a months advance booking!
I am establishing all the routine things that need to be in place for me to feel that this is also my home. I am very curious to see how i feel when i get back up north, I know that this is a big adjustment for Dotty but,, who knows. it could bring about a new pattern or friendships for her too.
In the spirit of my "wise old lady" self I am reserviing judgement on how thisi will all work; I just felt it was the right thing to do and the right time to do it,
I am so glad that I booked for 3 months this year and not just because of the weather up north. That extra month has given me a sense of being a seasonal resident, not just on vacation. I know people think I am rationalizingwhen I say it is for my health, but I wish I could convey how much healthier I feel down here.
I have begun to build new friendships, mainly thru church, I will be only about 4 minutes from the Davis' although their schcdule requires a months advance booking!
I am establishing all the routine things that need to be in place for me to feel that this is also my home. I am very curious to see how i feel when i get back up north, I know that this is a big adjustment for Dotty but,, who knows. it could bring about a new pattern or friendships for her too.
In the spirit of my "wise old lady" self I am reserviing judgement on how thisi will all work; I just felt it was the right thing to do and the right time to do it,
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
