Who is this old woman?

When I was very young I used to be able to "leave my body" and watch myself from the perspective of a corner of the ceiling, for example. ( I was involved with a lot of parapsychology stuff as a teenager; probably trying to escape ny reality). Lately, I've been experiencing something similar but now I don't recognize what I see as me. Now I see this old woman, posture gone to hell, limping along with the bad knee, moving ever so slowly, running out of steam much too quickly, and, oh yes, about 30 lbs overweight. Who is this woman? Do I have to claim her?

She frets about the little stuff; forgets the grocery list when she goes to the store; falls asleep when reading a book; knows every public toilet on the route she takes for any trip; and she has becme obsessed with her will and disposing of her stuff when she's gone. That's my observation from the corner of the room, anyway.

From the inside looking out, however, nothing much has changed. I still think I can run any organization or business better than the one doing it; still think that I should be able to sit up til midnight reading a good book; still think I should be out there pruning and weeding this huge perrenial garden that is turning into a jungle, and , of course, eat and drink anything I want.

Hard to reconcile these two Charlenes. Is it possible I am both? But who is that old lady?