Goodbye Dayton

Cars packed; two way radios ready;dog drugged and we're off at 7:30 am .the destination for first day....Atlanta GA. No problems today....weather cloudy but we missed the rain and made it to Atlanta by 4:30,
Keto behaving beautifully so far. tomorrow another 8 hour day will take us to Tampa..we can't get into house until first, so might as well take iteasy on the road time.'

On.. the Road Again

The adventure has begun! I am sitting at the kitchen table at Rich and Patty's in Dayton after arriving yesterday about 11 am...we pulled out of Kankakee at 5 am because we wanted te miss the snow, whidh we did.

I thought I would try Keto witihout the tranquilizer which was a majjor mistake. We had to pull off the road and pop a pill by 40 minutes into the trip because his anxiety level was over the top. Thankfully that worked and he was quiet the rest of the way.

The Greggas came over for dinner last night and tonight we go there for dinner,

Keto has made himself at home here; we brought THE PILLOW which he is so grateful. but this walking stuff is work!

Everyone is up for breakfast now so will sign off but will keep you all posted this way.

The Big Day

Well, actually tomorrow is the day I leave, but since I have everything packed and Rick and Patty are due here by dinnner time I am counting today as the beginning of our winter migration. The weather forecast keeps saying rain/snow...ugh! But tomorrow we'll be off for Dayton and at least that is somewhat south.
New pictures on the Ceiva this morning....always a thrill. (Should I take it? Should I not take it? still haven't decided)
This was a good Christmas for me even though I d idn't have everyone together. Carl and Heather were here for t he day before and Carl went with me to the Christmas Eve servive which was a special treat for me. Larry and Steve were for several days before that and I got to spend time with them.

And Tuesday was actually lovely. Especially how it started. Amelia called me at 5:30 am all excited and describing the abundance of packages Santa left AND he ate all the Nana cookies put out for him. Once everybody was awake and ready t hey called me and we both used speaker phones so I was "there" for all the ripping and tearing. I think I spent an hour on the phone.
About midmorning Joanne Schwade from across the street called and said one of her daughters surprised them and came home and would I join the three of them for dinner at 2?
That was fun, besides a great meal and good company, because Jim was having a computer problem and I FIXED IT! Can you believe it?
And then Dotty came home; we exchanged news and Christmas was over, Amen. I still don't like this holiday and am amazed at how many people feel the same way. And say the same things. Too much pressure; too much going on at once; high expectations; consumerism rampant, etc, etc.
Why do we go along with it? Why don't we reinvent the season to something meaningful and reasonable? I'm going to start this as my New Year project and decide what kind of Christmas I would want. What about you? Do you wish it were different? How would it look if you were in control? Let's hear your version.

The Big Week

No, not Christmas, silly.....Florida!

I keep thinking should I feel bad about leaving my friends and life in Kankakee for 3 months so joyfully? Why am I almost embarrassed that I can afford to do this? How could I be so lucky that my brother and sister-in-law would willingly live with me for 3 months? And how cool is it that my long time best friends are there only 15 minutes away? How many years will I be lucky enough to be able to do this?

What fun to have Larry here for a few days and get to spend some time with him; Carl and Heather and Steven....just not my New York family that I'm hoping I can lure to Florida (at least the female contingent....the professor may have to stay home and write).

I am looking forward to Patty being my partner in working off some inches while we're enjoying the warmth. I am starting to feel desperate.

And I cannot explain why I have not felt like writing at all; maybe getting into Shar's class in Florida will get me going again,

All thoughts keep coming back to Florida!

Another term ends

Last night was my final church council meeting as President. Slowly but surely I am letting go of my extra curricular responsibilities. This is a big step for me, silly as that may seem. I have been involved and usually in charge of so many governing bodies for so long, at least 25 years, that it is part of who I am and how I define myself.
And this is something I want to do and need to do, but I wonder if I would give it up so willingly if I didn't have the Parkinson's.
We all tend to define ourselves with the titles or positions we fill at work or as volunteers. And other people define us that way too. I can tell how differently certain people treat me at the hospital now that I am not the Chairman, but just a board member. And 2008 is my last year at that too.
So what are my titles now? Nana is the most important one. Mom still sounds good to me. Friend has become more important. But these days I increasingly refer to myself as an old lady, to which everyone responds with denials. No matter that it is true. Being old is part of the journey and entitles me to do what I want, say what I want, and use my time left as I want.

Besides if people my age don't step aside and let younger folks take over we are denying theme their turn. My future is a hell of a lot shorter than my past at this point, and I want to coast a while and just be me.

So will I chair your committee or take a seat on that board? No, I am much too busy being me.

Happy Birthday, Patricia Ann!

Tomorrow Tricia turns Jack Benny's age and I can't let the occasion go by without a long distance toast to my beloved daughter-in-law.
I have known her since she was 18. I could not picture Erich without Tricia ever since he first brought her home. It was always clear that they were a great match. So first I have to give credit to my son for knowing how to chose a life partner.
Tricia, even in the midst of crisis, is always quick to laugh and make others smile. She has at the very deepest part of her a joy of life and a genuine love of others. There have been many times when she has shouldered so much responsibility that her light struggled to shine because she has been the one to step up to the plate when no one else would (I know, Prof.Hertz, too many mixed metaphors).
She is a loving, playful, hardworking mom who worries about them too much like all moms. But she is molding loving, thoughtful, delightfully happy little girls, not that I'm biased. And of course she has had help in that from that wonderful, thoughtful, loving husband of hers, not that I'm biased.
She seldom complains about anything, even health problems. She is smart, very smart and like all stay at home moms she worries about how to get back out there and yet not detract from her role as mom. And I am confident that she'll work it out and find her niche.
I love to spend time with her; I am honored that she wants to share things with me and trusts me to be a substitute mom. I treasure the times we get to talk about the serious things.
And lately we've talked about lots of serious things and I value her input when I am wrestling with something.
She is a lovely, loving, woman and I'm grateful she's my daughter.

Ramblings

I feel like I am in a state of suspension. I look out the window on a foot of snow and wonder what am I doing here? My on going prayer is please no more ice storms, huge snowfalls, temps in the teens until after we flee south. This is as about as self centered as you can get; thinking the weather should take into account your own travel plans.
Remember my lists? Well, I'm checking them twice and checking off items and am at the point that I am ready to pack, even though my departure is more than a week away. So I am launching into re-organizing projects like yesterday Dotty and I cleaned and reorganized kitchen cabinets. Isn't this pathetic?
We cancelled church for the second week in a row because of w eather; probably a record. I know, I'm dwelling on this weather too much.
I might start working on wardrobe to take with me today; I certainly can't focus on much of anything that doesn't involve getting ready to go. Today Keto goes to the vet to have his teeth cleaned so I have to brave the cold this am to get him there at 8; when it's this cold my tremors are almost uncontrollable even with the meds.
Enough whining! I'm going to start getting out the Florida clothes!

Where I Shop

Just a few of my favorite sites for shopping, in case you haven't finished yet:

Overstock.com
A little bit like Marshalls and Big Lots rolled into one. Sometimes you can find wonderful stuff; sometimes nothing.

Zappos.com
I can't imagine a woman who doesn't know this site....the absolute best place to look for shoes and purses, especially European brands. Excellent service; no problem with returns either ( I can hear the "how can you shop for shoes if you can't try them on?" comments). They don't mark down much on sales though.

Novica.com
This is the site sponsored by National Geographic and it features wonderful stuff from all over the world. Great place to look for a gift if you have no idea what to give.

Etsy.com
My find of the year. It is like a co-op of artists who have a venue for selling their creations. I love the jewelry but there are dozens of catagories and literally thousands of items; you could spend hours shopping at this one site. You have to use Paypal but that's no big deal. And the artists and artisens are so happy to make a sale that they usually include a little note when they ship your purchase.

Chicos.com
You all know my love of Chicos, but I only shop the sale selections; they really know how to mark things down and their return system is also easy.

Landsend.com
Again I go straight to the outlet where they are serious about their markdowns.

Footsmart.com
If you are getting old, if you have problems with your feet this is the place, but I really don't want to talk about it.

Non-shopping but great sites:

Caedes Desktop Backgrounds: some great photography and computer generated art for free desktop backgrounds

WebMD: a reliable easy to use resource for all things medical.

Just a few of my favorites; your turn.

18 and counting

This is our third day of gray, freezing rain, sleet (yes, there is a difference), snow; in other words misery. When I go out I walk gingerly and breathe a sigh of relief that I made it t o the car. I've tried to think of something positive to say about this weather but I am drawing a blank. The best thing I can come up with is that I am leaving in 18 days, inshallah. It was so bad this morning that we cancelled church!

After 2 weeks of erratic behavior and one full day of no service I finally got someone scheduled to come out tomorrow to check my internet service. So guess what? It has been working all day like a charm. Of course. Their time table for tomorrow? Somewhere between 8 am and 5 pm. Well, that narrows it down.

I have done all my Christmas stuff; I now have 18 days to obsess about what to pack for Florida.

Ask and you shall receive

Yesterday was an all day cookie session; by the time I had all the plates arranged and ready to deliver I was too exhausted to consider it. When I asked in yesterday's blog if anyone had an answer to ending a tradition, my ever creative niece gave me an idea.
Why should I churn out dozens of cookies at Christmas time to let my neighbors know I appreciate them? Why not spread it out over the year? Sarah was talking about doing her news letter in January instead of December, but why could't I pick one neighbor a month, for example, and bake a treat for them then? That sounds like much more fun to me and we all get too much sweet stuff at once now.
So I am going to set up a calendar for the 9 months I'm here and not go t hru this mass production thing again.
Part of this frustration is the awareness that I can't stand on my feet all day in the kitchen anymore. Why do I have to get daily messages that I am getting older? All right, already...I know it!

Tradition

Winter wonderland, my foot. It is 3 degrees out there and another storm advisory...2 to 4 inches expected. And it isn't even winter yet. But I am fortunate. I have no meetings or appointments today. Ah, retirement when you can hunker down at home when you choose to.

What I am hunkered down with is dozens and dozens of cookies. We have started that process where we traipse through the snowy evening with plates of cookies for our neighbors and it looks like we will not only have the cookies, but also the snow to traipse in tonight.

If you've ever started a tradition that you wish you could give up, let me hear from you. I need some creative ways to extricate myself from several traditions like the cookie express.

Get it when you can

Computer fairy is not always so reliable so figure I would blog when I've got service; this is not usually a good time for me to be coherent.

Exciting stuff coming from St. Louis; Heather is really racking up the interviews including one at Northwestern in January...there, now both Carl and I have scooped her!

So I am giving into to the Christmas thing (actually have Christmas music playing); we started on the cookie marathon. We have two kinds done; 3 more to go, including the ever popular sugar cookies. Our recipient list keeps growing; I figured we would need to make at least 24 dozen....

I am having a hard time concentrating on anything; all I really want to do is pack for Florida and hit the road south. But I take refuge in my lists. Very frustrating to have items on the list that depend on someone else getting something done.

I have an early meeting in the am so this is very close to infringing on bedtime...it's after 8 here already!

Unplugged

Last night....winter...dark...Sunday. Who wouldn't turn to the internet (after 60 minutes, of course). PANIC! My service is down. I am isolated, cut off from friends and family, from shopping! I am an addict, you see. Most of you who know me know that I have a chocolate habit, a Chardonnay habit, and now the internet. There's chocolate and Chardonnay in the house, but NO INTERNET!
After trying the usual rebooting procedure about four times, praying to the SBC gods all the time, still not the special combination of lights I need to see on the modem. And to add to my frustration level I could not find the help number for the service.
So of course I call my own special help number, my private expert computer guru, son Carl and he says I've done all I could do and he's watching the Bears play. They're leading(but they'll lose).

It is hopeless. I am left with half a computer. Sure, I could write documents and play Spider, but sitting there with that gray signal in the bottom corner is too sad. And I've been around long enough that I've learned sometimes you have to walk away and hope the computer fairy comes during the middle of the night and waves her magic wand.

And she did!

After a few false starts, the green lights blinked into position...the little blue square said the tempature is 22 degrees (ugh) and I knew I was back in business..oh joy, oh joy.

A happy ending. I love happy endings!

December 1

The cold, the cold, the sleet, the snow.
What have I done to deserve this?
Was it the bah,humbug about Christmas or
the arrogance it took to toss out my boots?
Perhaps it is my indifference to my
working friends who cannot get away.
Or, even worse, the invites I have not made
to visit the sun and my swimming pool.

So, for now my home is my haven
while winds howl and sidewalks are ice.
Let them all bundle up and freeze their tears
as they go about surviving this winter life
just as I, too, used to do.
Oh, January first, how I long for you!